If you won the lottery...............

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Motomom34, Jan 12, 2016.


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  1. Witch Doctor 01

    Witch Doctor 01 Mojo Maker

    Have a monkey get together in a neutral location all fees paid... with Gator cooking....
     
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  2. kellory

    kellory An unemployed Jester, is nobody's fool. Banned

    I'd say gator and tac, working together would be an impressive spread.

    After all the bill paying, and relatives taken care of, I think I would invest in this project.....Training Center! My ticket out? : Hunter Health & Fitness • Deer & Deer Hunting Forums

    (Read it all the way through, there are a lot of intermingled ideas here, and the notion could be very feasible.) I think it would make money hand over fist, and if it didn't, with that kind of money, I wouldn't care. I'd still love it.
     
  3. Pax Mentis

    Pax Mentis Philosopher King |RIP 11-4-2017

    Well...the first thing would be distribution to friends and family.
    After that, there are 2 projects I would love to be able to do.
    1) Obtain land and assist homeless willing to work daily on basic construction to build tiny houses on land in various places across the country...this would include a "forever lease" on the land at a cost of $1 per year. The house and lease would be sellable, but not rentable.
    2) Obtain land and build a dog park in every city and town that doesn't have one across the country. Traveling in the motorhome, I have come to appreciate dog parks greatly and really hate it when we reach a place that doesn't have one.
    I know these seem a little strange and totally not prepper related, but I am a little strange myself and they are things I would like to do.
     
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  4. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    Well the jackpot was finally won, and not by me. There goes my dream of building a scale replica of the Eiffel Tower out of Cheetos...
     
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  5. Pax Mentis

    Pax Mentis Philosopher King |RIP 11-4-2017

    Not me either...oh well.
     
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  6. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    I won another day on God's green earth.... good enough for me!! [treecutter]
     
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  7. Dunerunner

    Dunerunner Brewery Monkey Moderator

    Me either... Again... Providence has saved my life.

    There are times though when I wish providence would take a hike!! :(
     
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  8. Pax Mentis

    Pax Mentis Philosopher King |RIP 11-4-2017

    Well, since I consider any day I wake up to be a win, today makes about 24392-3 in my favor.
    [touchdown][touchdown]
     
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  9. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    Interesting corollary, the odds of the winner randomly picking your name out of the phonebook and sending you half of their winnings are actually greater than your statistical probability of winning this lotto.
     
  10. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    Yep, that's why I only bought one ticket. Even if we won the smallest prize, we would have doubled our money. If we won nothing, we're only out $2, which I can make back by recycling cans from neighbors in about 10minutes.
     
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  11. Legion489

    Legion489 Rev. 2:19 Banned

    All kidding aside, I was asked "what would you do with a million dollars?" I had no answer. I have no idea what would do. Sort of like asking what would I do if I could flap my arms and fly, what/where do I go? Probably I would give enough to a friend who has kept me sane so he would never have to work again. Put up floor to ceiling book shelves in every room. Give to my Church. Buy a bunch of books for the local library. Realistically? I probably have all I really need.

    True story: One poor (as in flat busted) guy lived in a one room shack with his dog. He won the lottery and had a million bucks. Suddenly every 15th cousin seven times removed and strangers started calling, showing up, day and night at all hours, asking for money. His brother tried to have him killed for the money. His brothers and sisters tried to have him committed to get their hands on the money. The guy finally put it ALL in a trust and said "Give it all to deserving charities!" and when it was all gone, went back to his shack and dog. When asked why he gave it all away he said "No one bothered me every few minutes day and night when I was poor. No one tried to kill me when I was poor. No one tried to get me thrown in a nut ward when I was poor. I was happy by myself and my dog loves me if I'm rich or if I'm poor. I was happier poor, so I gave it all away."

    That's what I would do too. Except I would hire a hit man to kill everyone who showed up until I was broke again.
     
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  12. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    That's why my first step if I ever won would be to get in touch with financial/legal experts to make sure I wouldn't have to worry about that. For myself, all I want is my off-grid Thomas Kinkade type stone cottage with greenhouse and root cellar. After that, I'd give it all away. I've found being 'poor' has its advantages. You learn to be creative/resourceful, and you really don't have anything other people would try to (forcefully) take.
     
  13. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    [​IMG]
     
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  14. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    I don't see any new underwear in that picture, that's one thing I'd need, I'm pretty sure.

    And I've decided that while I would have financial advisors/lawyers, it would only be on a consulting basis. I would NOT give control of the money to ANYone.
     
  15. Motomom34

    Motomom34 Monkey+++

    If I won I would buy my fellow editors @Yard Dart and @Brokor a dictionary and instruct them how to use it. :whistle:
     
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  16. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

    They can read?
     
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  17. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    Harsh....no cake for you!! :p
     
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  18. Motomom34

    Motomom34 Monkey+++

    Ouch... no cake? I promise to behave and if I win the lottery, I will check myself into rehab for my sugar addiction. Here's a peace offering.... [​IMG]
     
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  19. avagdu

    avagdu Monkey++

    If I won the lottery I would buy a large swath of forested land and set up an intentional community where I would parcel out lots and invite my friends to live there, the venue would be based on Joel Skousen's book Strategic Relocation. Would finally seriously invest in precious metals, learn to grow food, aquaponic system, build an outdoor range / 'shoot house' and enjoy life.
     
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  20. Gator 45/70

    Gator 45/70 Monkey+++

    I would go fishing!
     
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