Moose Adventures

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Looking for love in all the wrong places

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Fishing with George Bush - kept getting his line snagged on everything but the fish and at the end of the day, sent the Secret Service off on a mission to the local fish monger. I, on the other hand, never pulled my line out of the water without one attached. Boy, does his face get red when he's annoyed

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[LEFT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]hmmm Gets me thinking. I can see a chain of these across the entire US, from New York City to San Francisco and every little berg and hamlet in between. Hire some pretty girls and boys to man the cash registers and I'll be a millionaire within a year. Start-up capital can't be more than a couple grand. I could probably make a 35% ROI and reinvest in more stores. My only competition will be Planned Parenthood.. I'm a genius!!!!![/COLOR][/FONT][/LEFT][LEFT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000][/COLOR][/FONT][/LEFT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Just hanging out down at the dock, looking for any passing moosettes

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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In the name of the Unitd States of American, I claim this as a U.S. Territory

1K

08 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Here I am with my own Camp Perry Shooting Team. What an Experience!

1K

07 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Came across this 1956 photo of my dad, Master Sgt Moose Sr., USMC Rifle Team at Camp Perry

1K

07 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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On my journey, I encountered a strange tribe of pygmy's who seemed both fascinated and repulsed by my ventilation hole. One little gnome was so curious, he actually tried to climb through and almost made it but got stuck half in and half out, unable to move in either direction. much to the amusement or possibly the horror of his companions. I imagine it appeared much like a scene from "Alien." Much to my dismay, they all tried poking and tickling him so that he would squirm loose which was quite painful for my poor gut. Eventually, the witch doctor (who looked startlingly like Gene Simmons) appeared and fed the boy a potion that made his body go slack and simply slide to the ground. Much like giving birth, I believe. I'll have to ask Momma about that the next time I see her.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've always wanted to ride a bucking bronco. At the moment, the reason for this escapes me.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I decided that if Condoms R Us is going to be successful, I really need more business education and what better place is there then that liberal bastion Yale. I've been trying to get an athletic scholarship based on my skill in so many sporting events but to date, my requests for free money have gone unanswered. I'm sure, however, that Mr. Obama will be happy to subsidize this endeavor since, strictly speaking, I'm an alien. I have a fishing license but that's it, no papers.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I forgot to tell you that my primary reason for the India trip was to cheer on Mother Theresa when she received her Nobel Prize. What a thrilling moment. I wonder how much that little medal is worth? I tried to convince her to invest in my United States chain of Condoms R Us but she didn't seem too keen on the idea. Just kept muttering something about the Holy Sea. I'm not sure where the Holy Sea is but she sure does seem to think it has a lot of power. Maybe there is a hydro plant there. Not sure what that has to do with an investment but she may want to put her money into something more liquid

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been so involved in water sports lately, I decided that I really wanted to try running the Iditarod so training must begin now. Sure do feel sorry for my black husky though, his scene never changes

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I have to tell you, my friends, there is nothing quite like being there and since I'm a big entertainment fan, I like watching too, just like Chance. Gotta get me a moosette

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Found a very lovely female TSA agent. I let her touch anything she wanted! Those drinks sure look refreshing but its going to be a long flight so I better pace myself or I'll end up like the gal across the aisle. I wonder if it was the Burka the TSA agent was wearing that made her seem a little stand offish. I just couldn''t see her smile. She never mentioned the word gamey once. [/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Get me outta here before this Michael Jackson wanna be get his mitts on my privates. Nuf said[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been having a particularly strong sweet tooth of late and nothing seems to satisfy my craving but a big, sweet, sticky bun. their coffee is menza menza but the donuts are indeed food for the gods but I'm a purist so I don't dunk my donuts

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I don't usually talk about this painful period in my life but yes, I was one of the original Kisses. In fact, it was my idea to hide our identities with makeup. I figured that no one was be able to distinguish one member from the other, all the egos would be kept in check. You know that old saying that some pigs are more equal than others? Well, the same can be said about Kisses. I was clearly the most talented member of the ensemble which resulted in a lot animosity from the other Kisses. I was the silk to their hemp and they all knew it. Eventually,I got the big Kiss off by none other than the big Kisser himself, Gene. We haven't spoken in years after that particularly crude smack in the face.Oh, I still hum a tune now and then but it's just not the same as when you have 5 Kisses in one. Life goes on

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been promising myself a trip to Mardi Gras. I just had to be part of the debauchery at least once in my lifetime. The music, the food, the colors, the bare breasts

1K

05 Aug 2012

Moose Adventures

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Looking for love in all the wrong places

Just hanging out down at the dock, looking for any passing moosettes

In the name of the Unitd States of American, I claim this as a U.S. Territory

Here I am with my own Camp Perry Shooting Team. What an Experience!

Came across this 1956 photo of my dad, Master Sgt Moose Sr., USMC Rifle Team at Camp Perry

I've always wanted to ride a bucking bronco. At the moment, the reason for this escapes me.

I've been so involved in water sports lately, I decided that I really wanted to try running the Iditarod so training must begin now. Sure do feel sorry for my black husky though, his scene never changes

I have to tell you, my friends, there is nothing quite like being there and since I'm a big entertainment fan, I like watching too, just like Chance. Gotta get me a moosette

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Get me outta here before this Michael Jackson wanna be get his mitts on my privates. Nuf said[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR][/FONT]

I've been having a particularly strong sweet tooth of late and nothing seems to satisfy my craving but a big, sweet, sticky bun. their coffee is menza menza but the donuts are indeed food for the gods but I'm a purist so I don't dunk my donuts

I've been promising myself a trip to Mardi Gras. I just had to be part of the debauchery at least once in my lifetime. The music, the food, the colors, the bare breasts

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