Moose Adventures

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been so involved in water sports lately, I decided that I really wanted to try running the Iditarod so training must begin now. Sure do feel sorry for my black husky though, his scene never changes

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]How do I get to Mama's from here? Got to get me some of that etouffee, and greens, and grits and cornbread and catfish and red beans and rice and gumbo and I gotta get some of those shrimp and fried chicken........ oh heck, I'll just check out of my hotel and bunk in with Mama. [/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Back to my roots! I need a daily espresso in order to get the old gut functioning. TGFS (thank God for Starbucks)

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been promising myself a trip to Mardi Gras. I just had to be part of the debauchery at least once in my lifetime. The music, the food, the colors, the bare breasts

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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There is no way I could explain the beauty that even the ugliest God-forlorn city takes on when viewed from 2,000 feet, away from the sounds and smells. The only downside for me was a most uncomfortable burner butt episode. Better to hang half out of the basket, holding on for dear life, than back into that seering flame that makes it a hot air balloon. If I had been able to find a cold air balloon, I probably would have been able to take a seat at dinner instead of standing up at the bar. I did meet a few cuties though but then the gamey word came up again. Maybe I need to see a doctor for more than the propane flame induced hemorroidal pain.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I've been having a particularly strong sweet tooth of late and nothing seems to satisfy my craving but a big, sweet, sticky bun. their coffee is menza menza but the donuts are indeed food for the gods but I'm a purist so I don't dunk my donuts

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Just hangin with a few of my buds. but for some odd reason, they kept patting my butt and telling me what a cutie I would be if I shaved my legs

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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On my journey, I encountered a strange tribe of pygmy's who seemed both fascinated and repulsed by my ventilation hole. One little gnome was so curious, he actually tried to climb through and almost made it but got stuck half in and half out, unable to move in either direction. much to the amusement or possibly the horror of his companions. I imagine it appeared much like a scene from "Alien." Much to my dismay, they all tried poking and tickling him so that he would squirm loose which was quite painful for my poor gut. Eventually, the witch doctor (who looked startlingly like Gene Simmons) appeared and fed the boy a potion that made his body go slack and simply slide to the ground. Much like giving birth, I believe. I'll have to ask Momma about that the next time I see her.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Really wanted to go the the Taj Mahal, the palace of love but I was getting nauseous in the back of that cab with the towel head driver playing chicken with everyone else on the road, the 200 degree heat, this fur coat, the smells (ugh) Maybe that's what gamey smells like. Good golly, I hope not. Anyway, when the driver slowed enough to take the corner on two wheels, I threw open the door and made a dive for the ground. Escape was my only option. but that little brown man blew a "U"ey and tried to run me down, screaming something unintelligible about rupees - illiterate little gnome doesn't even know it's pronounced "rufies" and anyway, I have no rufies. I ran as fast as I could toward the river where I planned to swim to safety but seeing the odd brown floaters in the water, I decided to just make a run for it. The closest place he couldn't get to with his little cab was at this Shiva Statue so that is where I found a safe haven from the mad cabbie

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Fishing with George Bush - kept getting his line snagged on everything but the fish and at the end of the day, sent the Secret Service off on a mission to the local fish monger. I, on the other hand, never pulled my line out of the water without one attached. Boy, does his face get red when he's annoyed

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Hey guys, it's CHICK Fil A, and neither of you look like chicks to me, but then again, I'm a moose with my own mating troubles so why should I try to figure out yours. As you were.[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000][/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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I don't usually talk about this painful period in my life but yes, I was one of the original Kisses. In fact, it was my idea to hide our identities with makeup. I figured that no one was be able to distinguish one member from the other, all the egos would be kept in check. You know that old saying that some pigs are more equal than others? Well, the same can be said about Kisses. I was clearly the most talented member of the ensemble which resulted in a lot animosity from the other Kisses. I was the silk to their hemp and they all knew it. Eventually,I got the big Kiss off by none other than the big Kisser himself, Gene. We haven't spoken in years after that particularly crude smack in the face.Oh, I still hum a tune now and then but it's just not the same as when you have 5 Kisses in one. Life goes on

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Since I stopped smoking those Italian Stogies I found in a cabin up North, I find that I have an amazing lung capacity which makes me a natural for underwater pipeline work. I think BP will allow me to live the life to which I would like to become accustomed for many years to come.

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Looking for love in all the wrong places

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]If I'm going to visit Parthenon, I better get a Chiton. Wonder if they carry them in the gift shop? If I run into my Athena I want to make sure I'm properly attired. Dress to Impress! Did I remember deodorant this morning. In the elevator yesterday, some pretty young thing said I was smelling a little gamey. Wonder what that means?[/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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Doesn't appear as though this is too much better. Hey Chicka Chicka Chicka, who's your Daddy? I don't know why the moosettes ignore me? I speak the language of love and they throw drinks in my face. It must be some kind of mating ritual. I wonder if I'm supposed to throw some in their faces too?

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Found a very lovely female TSA agent. I let her touch anything she wanted! Those drinks sure look refreshing but its going to be a long flight so I better pace myself or I'll end up like the gal across the aisle. I wonder if it was the Burka the TSA agent was wearing that made her seem a little stand offish. I just couldn''t see her smile. She never mentioned the word gamey once. [/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

F. Ticious

Moose Adventures

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[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Hey Darrell, Oh Darrell, guess who's here. Wanna go hunt Elephants with me?[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR][/FONT]

1K

05 Aug 2012

Moose Adventures

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I've been so involved in water sports lately, I decided that I really wanted to try running the Iditarod so training must begin now. Sure do feel sorry for my black husky though, his scene never changes

Back to my roots! I need a daily espresso in order to get the old gut functioning. TGFS (thank God for Starbucks)

I've been promising myself a trip to Mardi Gras. I just had to be part of the debauchery at least once in my lifetime. The music, the food, the colors, the bare breasts

I've been having a particularly strong sweet tooth of late and nothing seems to satisfy my craving but a big, sweet, sticky bun. their coffee is menza menza but the donuts are indeed food for the gods but I'm a purist so I don't dunk my donuts

Just hangin with a few of my buds. but for some odd reason, they kept patting my butt and telling me what a cutie I would be if I shaved my legs

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Hey guys, it's CHICK Fil A, and neither of you look like chicks to me, but then again, I'm a moose with my own mating troubles so why should I try to figure out yours. As you were.[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000][/COLOR][/FONT]

Since I stopped smoking those Italian Stogies I found in a cabin up North, I find that I have an amazing lung capacity which makes me a natural for underwater pipeline work. I think BP will allow me to live the life to which I would like to become accustomed for many years to come.

Looking for love in all the wrong places

Doesn't appear as though this is too much better. Hey Chicka Chicka Chicka, who's your Daddy? I don't know why the moosettes ignore me? I speak the language of love and they throw drinks in my face. It must be some kind of mating ritual. I wonder if I'm supposed to throw some in their faces too?

[FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000]Hey Darrell, Oh Darrell, guess who's here. Wanna go hunt Elephants with me?[/COLOR][/FONT][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR][/FONT]

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