CAJUNS IN HEAVEN Gabriel came to the Lord and said, "I have to talk to you, I have some Cajuns up here in Heaven who are causing some problems. They are swinging on The Pearly Gates. My horn is missing. Barbecue sauce is all over their robes. Ham hock, spareribs, and crawfish shells are all over the streets of gold. Some folks are walking around with one wing. They have been late taking their turn in keeping the stairway to heaven clean. There are watermelon seeds all over the clouds. They have eaten almost every animal up here! Some of them aren't even wearing their halos, saying it is messing up their hair." The Lord said, "I made them special, as I did you, my angel. Heaven is home to all my children. If you really want to know about problems, let's call the Devil and see how he is dealing with them." The Devil answered the phone, "Hello? Dang, hold on." The Devil returned to the phone and said, "Hello, God, what can I do for you?" God replied, "Tell me what kind of problems you are having down there with the Cajuns you have there." The Devil said, "Wait one minute," and puts the Lord on hold. After 5 minutes he returned to the phone, and said "Okay, I'm back. What was the question?" God asked again, "What kind of problems are you having down there?" The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this..... Hold on, God." This time the Devil was gone for 15 minutes. The Devil returned and said, "I'm sorry, God I can't talk right now. These coonasses have done put the fire out, and are holding a benefit Crawfish and Shrimp boil to install air conditioning."
Three cajuns, ELbeaux, Melbeaux, and Boudreau, went hunting up in Alaska. The second morning, the game warden stopped by their camp, and they had a moose, shot right between the eyes. The game warden said:"you guys from Louisiana sure are good shots." The third morning, the game warden stopped again, and they had a caribou shot right between the eyes. The game warden again remarked about our cajun trio's markmanship. The next morning, the game warden again stopped by the camp, but this time, they had a bear, again shot right between the eyes, but he also had a bullet hole through each paw. When the warden asked how he got those holes, Boudreaux said: " everytime ELbeaux put the light on him, he cover his eyes up."
ELbeaux. Pretty clever. Until Feb. I had a house in La. I lived there from 94-99. If I would have thought of that earlier, I might have a new user name. He he he..... BTW, MELbeaux was the shooter..................
clyde: Bonjour, je voudre change vun dollar french attendant: evil stare clyde: je voudre change vun dollar french attendant: more evil stare---lots of humphing, himming and hawing then replies with just speak english clyde: I would like to exchange 20 dollars french attendant: (grumpily and extremely slowy hands me money) clyde: merci attendant: (nothing) What I learned from this situation: Just speak English like the rest of the world. The true, universal language.
ELbeaux was stopped by Dufresne, a local game warden in da bayous of South Louisiana recently with two buckets full of dem largemouth bass when leaving Lake Verret; a spot well known for it's excellent fishing. Warden Dufresne asked ELbeaux, "Do you have a license to catch dem fish?" ELbeaux replied to Dufresne, "Mais non. Dese here are my pet fish." "Pet fish?", the warden asked. "Mais yeah! Every night I take dese here fish down here to da lake and let dem swim round for awhile. I whistle and dey come back and jump into da buckets and I take them back home." "That's a bunch of hooey! Fish can't do that!" ELbeaux looked at Warden Dufresne for a moment, and then said, "Here, I'll show you. It really works!" "OK, I've GOT to see this!" Dufresne was curious now. ELbeaux poured the fish into the lake and stood and waited. After several minutes Dufresne turned to ELbeaux and said, "Well?" "Well, what?" ELbeaux responded. "When are you going to call them back?", Dufresne prompted. "Call who back?" ELbeaux asked. "The fish!" replied Warden Dufresne. "What fish?", ELbeaux asked.
