1. Good: Your wife is pregnant. Bad: It's triplets Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago. 2. Good: Your wife's not talking to you Bad: She wants a divorce Ugly: She's a lawyer 3. Good: Your son is finally maturing Bad: He's involved with the Woman next door Ugly: So are you 4. Good: Your son studies a lot in his room Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there Ugly: You're in them 5. Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids Bad: You can't find your birth control pills Ugly: Your teenage daughter borrowed them 6. Good: Your husband understands fashion Bad: He's a cross-dresser Ugly: He looks better than you 7. Good: You give the "birds and bees" talk to your daughter Bad: She keeps interrupting Ugly: With corrections 8. Good: The postman's early Bad: He's wearing fatigues and carrying a shotgun Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas 9. Good: Your son is dating someone new Bad: It's another man Ugly: He's your best friend 10. Good: Your daughter got a new job Bad: As a hooker Ugly: Your coworkers are her best clients Way ugly: She makes more money than you do
