Notes on Women Aging and Bob's guide for married men...

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by tacmotusn, Aug 28, 2009.


  1. tacmotusn

    tacmotusn Mosquito Sailor

    *BOB's GUIDE FOR MARRIED MEN and those in a serious relationship*

    *It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive, aging woman. *

    *My name is BOB. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Kim. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Kim to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. *

    *I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club and watch the lingerie show, so eating out is not a reasonable solution. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door. *

    *She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed. *

    *I think another symptom of aging is complaining. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, right? So I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points. *

    *When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too. *

    *I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Kim. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other. *

    *Signed, *

    *BOB*


    *EDITOR'S NOTE: *

    BOB died suddenly on May 27 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Callaway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a sledge hammer laying nearby. His wife Kim was arrested and charged with BOB's demise. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that BOB somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.
     
  2. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    The "He Needed Killin'" defense was valid here....[CRC]
     
  3. tacmotusn

    tacmotusn Mosquito Sailor

    lol ... and to quote the original post;

    It's important for men to remember, that, as women grow older, some are oversensitive, and there is nothing worse than an oversensitive, aging woman.

    I hereby rest my case. how about it jury?
     
  4. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    Poor, poor BOB. :(
     
  5. Valkman

    Valkman Knifemaker Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    Those all women juries are hell! Go BOB!
     
  6. Tango3

    Tango3 Aimless wanderer

    guess she wanted to "play through"????
     
  7. dragonfly

    dragonfly Monkey+++

    "FORE"!
     
  8. MinTX

    MinTX lostinaustin

    You got that right CRC.

    BTW... bit of a parrot head myself [winkthumb]
     
  9. E.L.

    E.L. Moderator of Lead Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    Why does this not suprise me?
     
  10. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member


    YAY! That makes 2 of us....We're slowly taking over.... [winkthumb]
     
  11. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member


    Did you make the Dallas show this year? Our group had the largest tailgate there...RM even broadcast from there for a while....Uncle Jim even came and stayed at our place for a while.... That was pretty stinkin' cool....

    I stopped counting long ago at how many shows I've been to...all I know is it's 3 figures, over the years.... :)
     
  12. MinTX

    MinTX lostinaustin

    Last one I went to was in Chula Vista last October. Had a blast!
    Trying to get time off work to go anywhere else has been a nightmare!
    [dunno]
     
  13. Tango3

    Tango3 Aimless wanderer

    QUOTE=Tracy;104626]Poor, poor BOB. :([/QUOTE]

    meet BOB: [​IMG]

    poor poor BOB is right:Seems BOB has been arrestesed for fraud:[​IMG]




    Smilin' Bob Not Smilin' Anymore
    http://news.slashdot.org/news/08/09/01/2020244.shtml



    from the at-least-he'll-be-popular-in-prison dept.
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]
    Consumerist reports an Associated Press release that Steve Warshak, 42, was found guilty of 93 counts of conspiracy, fraud and money laundering.




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