Made me laugh today:

I've accidentally swallowed some Scrabble tiles.

My next crap could
spell disaster.

 

"dyslexics of the world untie!!!"

 

Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? Lies awake every night wondering if there's a Dog...

 

Or the paranoid dyslexic, in a panic told his psychologist, "Doc, I think I'm following someone!"

 

did you hear of the midget fortune teller who was arrested for fraud, then escaped? authorities are now looking for a small medium at large......

 

I was walking through the mall and saw that there was a "Muslim Book Store." I was wondering what exactly was in a "Muslim book store" so I went in.
I was wandering around taking a look, and the clerk stopped me...he asked if he could help me; I imagine I didn't look like his normal clientele.
So I asked for a copy of the U.S. Immigration Policy Book regarding Muslims.
The Clerk said, "F* ck off, get out, and stay out !"
I said, "Yes, that's the one. Do you have that in paperback?"

 

As a kid my mom was a member of DAM, Mothers Against Dyslexia.

 

"Are you illiterate? Are you unable to read and write? If so, send me a PM for further instructions....."

 

It was definitely funnier the third time I read it!

 

It has been a long long time ago, but when I was about 17 or so and MADD (mothers against drunk drivers) was a new and vocal organization, I had a tee shirt from a local head shop (don't start, it was over 4 decades ago), that was printed with DAMM (drunks against mad mothers).

 

You heard of the cowboy jailed for wrapping cows in brown paper? They got him for cattle rustling.....