Loneliness & mental survival

Whether living minimal grid or in the middle of a city, loneliness is a very real state of mind, but it doesn't exist anywhere except for within the mind. During periods of mental aloneness, it is good to remember that loneliness cannot exist unless we allow it to. Easier said than done you might ask? Absolutely, but consider the alternative to feeling loneliness, with all the negative mental/spiritual and even physical repercussions. Instead of visiting loneliness upon ourselves, we must force ourselves to get moving and doing even the simplest things to climb out of the pit of loneliness. What do you do when lonely comes over for a visit?

 

Put a cat in my lap, or a dog on my ottoman. Or both.

 

Embrace it ,,,, think back on all the times I wish I was alone ,,, but wasn't ,,

 

The older I get the more I want to be alone, seems like everyone around me irritates me more and more. But I find getting into reading something will take that feeling away

 

Been trying to climb out of that pit since daughter died. Not very successfully. Seeing Psychologist, take the S.i.L. shopping. Get to church most weeks. Helps for a while, until I come home to empty house. Paternal grand father talked about the same thing after Gramma died. Tried volunteering, no satisfaction. Have limited social skills. Can't dance, skate, swim. Have no Idea how to meet someone. Because of the façade I present to the public, people think everything is ok. Continued existence just seems pointless.

 

I can understand your issue , considering your loss . I am no psychologist , or a doctor of any kind , so my advice may be worthless . Maybe you could get a roommate , or a part time roommate . Just a thought . I wish you luck . Hang in there .

 

No answer from here.

 

Huey Lewis And The News - I Want A New Drug - YouTube

www.youtube.com › watch
Lyrics
Oh
I want a new drug, one that won't make me sick
One that won't make me crash my car
Or make me feel feet, feet, feet thick
I want a new drug, one that won't hurt my head
One that won't make my mouth too dry
Or make my eyes too red
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
When I'm alone with you
I want a new drug, one that won't spill
One that don't cost too much
Or come in a pill
I want a new drug, one that won't go away
One that won't keep me up all night
One that won't make me sleep all day
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
I'm alone with you
I'm alone with you, baby
I want a new drug, one that does what it should
One that won't make me feel too bad
One that won't make me feel too good
I want a new drug, one with no doubt
One that won't make me talk to much
Or make my face break out
One that won't make me nervous
Wonderin' what to do
One that makes me feel like I feel when I'm with you
I'm alone with you
I'm alone with you, yeah, yeah

 

I tend to do better on my own. I enjoy solitude and being with my thoughts !! Probably a factor of being the only adopted child of a hard working mother (my father passed when I was 18months) when ended up living alone (not by choice) from 15.

 

@Marvin L. Steinhagen
Read here is fine , BUT YOU AND I CAN'T CHANGE THE WORLD
WE can take walks , say hi & good morning to good lookin woman is my trick ..
We make the slump or the Gud-day Ms !!! Smile ,, Ya never know !!

Be Well Sir
Sloth / N

 

Well, first thing I can say is probably best to fire your shrink - I mean - WTH! One of the nice things about forums you can state your true feelings without all the baggage and if what you're say is true then that guy is a waste of time and money. Shrinks...bah! Those guys are highly overrated...my ex-wife was one. I think most of them are in the field so they can try and cure themselves!

The second thing, exercise. It might sound ridiculous but it seriously helps in all ways. And, if you can't swim then now is the time to learn. Why? Why the hell not? And, it's good exercise...

Third, are you a Ham operator? Talk about a way to meet people and learn something interesting! Get your license and join a club. It's easy and loads of fun and has a very practical purpose also. There is a ton of stuff to learn and do!

Fourth, animals. Animals help. Animals give unconditional love - hell - I even talk to mine at times! Sounds a bit whacko but they're part of the family so...right now I am seriously considering changing the little cat's name to Benny as in Ben Laden because she is turning into a damn terrorist! Wife is gone for 5 weeks and she thinks she runs this rodeo...I am finding it difficult to prove she does not but that's another story...

Fifth, why aren't you more active on the forum? Writing keeps the grey matter flowing and there are always lots of good topics to comment on. Get stuck in! For better or for worse, get stuck in!

Look, if you are still grieving then that is different but if it has been a while then you need to move on and live. Life is made to live. Your daughter wouldn't want you to simply exist now would she...no, she would not. And, who is to say you won't see her again? I believe you will. I am not much into religion, manmade crap but I suppose it has its good points as well as bad, but I damn well know God is real so...

Anyway, feel free to PM me...I check Monkey a couple times a day...seriously consider a radio, reaching out over the airwaves is a great way to meet like-minded people but be advised it is habit forming. LOL!

 

I see the therapist about twice a year. And she has given me good advice. S.A.D. hits me more than ever before.. I also lost my wife six months before my daughter, JoAnn in Aug of '17(lung cancer, DON"T START SMOKING), Angie in Feb of '18 (complications from flu). And being diagnosed with Parkinson's don't help. I got my HAM ticket in 2010, I only had to study for 47 years, DRAC meets every month. Started a P. T. class called Rock Steady boxing, geared toward P.D. feel really clumsy at it. It helps to be able to vent on these forums. Thanx everyone.

 

A good antidote for loneliness is physical activity.

If you observe yourself, you may see that your loneliness is worst at certain times of the day or night.
Those times will often (if not usually) coincide with the times when your body feels run down.

So take care of your body, first. Get rid of that run-down feeling.

Get a bicycle and ride it around the block (or wherever) for fifteen minutes or so. Or get some small hand weights and do arm ballet with them for three minutes by the clock. Or both.

Get sweaty, then take a seriously hot shower and use up all the hot water. Make it a double-sudser, and do some serious singing while you're in there. Preferably off-key.

Join a gym, if you can. Go in every other day and hit the hot tub/steam room, swim, exercise, and get a seriously good shower--using up all their hot water!

Dress up, even if you have nowhere to go. Make it a point to be well dressed. Then go someplace and watch people doing interesting and/or amusing things.

Ever seen a mime class in the park? It's a hoot.

White you're there, check out the tai chi.

Loneliness is something that has to be noticed to exist. When you're too busy or preoccupied to notice that you're lonely--you aren't!

Note: posted before the above message became visible. Good going, ML. The more you do, the more you got did.

 

Go for a long walk , and breath , eat lunch out and go see the outside for a bit..
Very sorry to read your spot, as was mine 20 years ago r so ..
It gets better , but it takes time Sir .

Sloth /N

 

Keep moving, it makes for a harder target for the Blues to find.

 

Get a puppy and you and he/she will be codependent with each other

 

Yep, I got a dog.