One morning this blonde calls her friend and says "Please come over and help me. I have this killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to start it." Her friend asks "What is it a puzzle of?" The blonde says "From the picture on the box, it's a Tiger." The blonde's friend figures that he's pretty good at Puzzles, so he heads over to her place. She lets him in the door and shows him to where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, and then studies the box. He then turns to her and says: "First, no matter what I do,I'm not going to be able to show you how to assemble these to look like the picture of that tiger. Second, I'd advise you to relax, have a cup of coffee, and put all these Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes back in the box."</pre>
1ST BLONDE JOKE OF 2008 I went to the movies the other night and sat in an aisle seat, as I usually do, because it feels a little roomier. Just as the feature was about to start, a blonde from the center of the row got up and started working her way out. "Excuse me. Sorry! Oops. Excuse me, pardon me, gotta hurry. Oops! Excuse me." By the time she got to me, I was trying to look around her and I was a little impatient, so I said, "Couldn't you have done this a little earlier?" "No!" she said in a loud whisper. "The 'Turn Off Your Cell Phone, Please' message just flashed up on the screen and mine is out in the car."
Ok...that's "Steal" worthy... I'd send it to my daughter, but she probably wouldn't get it.... sheeesh.