a bottle of merlot

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CATO, Jul 15, 2012.

  1. CATO

    CATO Monkey+++

    A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

    So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman who is seated over there'.... and indicated the sender with a nod of his head.

    She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

    The note read: 'For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants'.

    After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return. He folded the note, handed it to the waiter and instructed him to deliver it to the lady.

    It read:
    'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to be, I have a Ferrari Maranello, BMW Z8, Mercedes CL600, and a Porsche Turbo in my several garages;
    I have beautiful homes in Aspen and Miami , and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana . There is over twenty million dollars in my bank account and portfolio.
    But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut off three inches.

    Just send the wine back.
  3. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    Why does a woman always have it make it so difficult!!!

  4. CATO

    CATO Monkey+++

    Well...if they weren't selective....they'd have no free time, be pregnant most of their lives, and we'd have over-population (beyond what we have). That's why it works out. [viking]
    ditch witch likes this.
  5. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    Noted Guit- But once they select you.... they ride you the rest of their life like a little pony, wanting more.
    As far as free time...... What is that? [peep]
  6. CATO

    CATO Monkey+++

    Then you're lucky. I was hooked to the grain mill...forever to walk in circles for some oats and a sweet apple every now and again.
    Yard Dart likes this.
  7. ditch witch

    ditch witch resident bacon hoarder

    But... I thought you guys WANTED to be rode like a pony?
    A dirty, dirty little pony...
    Yard Dart and bgner like this.
  8. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    I guess my metaphor was not intended, must have been thinking about something else when I typed.

  9. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    By the way, I love those shoes!! :sneaky:
  10. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

    Just put spurs on them for YD.
    Guit_fishN and Yard Dart like this.
  11. CATO

    CATO Monkey+++

    Giddeyap. Time to dust off the riding crop.
    Yard Dart likes this.
  12. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

  13. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator



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