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A Cowboy's Guide to Life

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Witch Doctor 01, Aug 24, 2011.

  1. Witch Doctor 01

    Witch Doctor 01 Mojo Maker

    Never squat with yer spurs on.

    There are two theories to arguin' with a woman; neither one works.

    Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew, your mouth is probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.

    If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around.

    After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring.
    He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
    The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

    If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop diggin'.

    Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.

    It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.

    Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.

    Never follow good whiskey with water, unless you're out of good whiskey.

    Good judgment comes from experience; experience comes from bad judgment.

    Always drink upstream from the herd.

    Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.

    If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

    When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't be surprised if they learn their lesson.

    When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown around by somebody else.

    Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back in.

    Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.

    The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back in your pocket.

    Never miss a good chance to shut up.
    chelloveck, Alpha Dog, BTPost and 6 others like this.
  2. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

  3. Gray Wolf

    Gray Wolf Monkey+++

    Some of those are pretty good.
  4. Seawolf1090

    Seawolf1090 Adventure Riding Monkey Founding Member

    Smart cowboy - I imagine Sam Elliot saying most of those.....
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