Amazingly Simple Home Remedies...

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CRC, May 8, 2007.


  1. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    yep..




    1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will instantly remove itself.

    2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.

    3. Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.

    4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.

    5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the snooze button.

    6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.

    7. You only need two tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

    8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

    Daily Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.
     
  2. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++

    I'm gonna be using that one :)
     
  3. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member



    Trust me...It's a LOT of fun! [winkthumb]


    [touchdown]
     
  4. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    It's fun pushing people down the stairs?
     
  5. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    It can be, relatively. Once upon a time, I managed a rooming house. One of the denizens came home one night in a belligerent mood, shall we say. Rather than shoot him as he was assaulting one of the other denizens, I shoved him down the steps. One flight of 16 risers was all it took to chill him 'till the cops came and gave him a free ride to the greybar hotel.
     
  6. Mortis

    Mortis Snake Eater

    ghrit,

    Bet ya have seen folks fall up stairs too. :sneaky:
     
  7. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    Ayuh, 'deed I have -- [touchdown] [booze] I know one of them well ---[booze]
     
  8. sheen_estevez

    sheen_estevez Monkey+++

    I think I found my new signature [LMAO]
     
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