Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, "It's the druggist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone." Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the druggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him, "Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it. This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I'd locked the house with both House and car keys inside and had to break a window to get my keys. "Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire." "When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, all the time The darn phone was ringing off the hook." He continued, "Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels and the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke." "Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a Rectal thermometer. And believe me mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her."
Reminds me of a feller in the city, he bought a new dirt bike and tried it out unsuccessfuly in his back yard, he rode through his sliding glass door and had to go to the emergency room to get sewed up from glass cuts. He got back home and had to take a dump, his wife had cleaned up the gas spilll in the living room with paper towels and threw them in th toyolet, well the feller got comfortable and lit a cigar, upon fininishing he threw the cigar in the toyolet, BOOM ..... back to the emergercency room.