Bed knobs, Broomsticks, Bedsheets and Halloween

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by tacmotusn, Oct 27, 2009.


  1. tacmotusn

    tacmotusn Mosquito Sailor

    Bed sheets

    An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.

    Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.

    In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.

    A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.

    As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard, (barely containing his (laughter), and who had watched the whole incident, walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?"

    The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost."

    Happy Halloween
     
  2. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    FIXING THE HEADSTONE

    Two men were walking home after a Halloween party and decided to take a shortcut through the cemetery just for laughs. Right in the middle of the cemetery they were startled by a tap-tap-tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.

    Trembling with fear, they found an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at one of the headstones.

    "Holy cow, Mister," one of them said after catching his breath, "You scared us half to death -- we thought you were a ghost! What are you doing working here so late at night?"

    "Those fools!" the old man grumbled. "They misspelled my name!"
     
  3. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    [FONT=Times New Roman, Arial]Do ZOMBIES eat popcorn with their fingers?
    No, they eat the fingers separately...

    [/FONT][FONT=Times New Roman, Arial]What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?
    A cereal killer...
    [/FONT]
     
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