<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD></TD><TD vAlign=top><!-- headline start --><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD colSpan=2></TD></TR><TR><TD style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 20px" vAlign=top width="99%">British dwarf's penis gets stuck to hoover</TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE></TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE> http://www.breitbart.com/article.php?id=070820195031.wml8lkpo&show_article=1&cat=0 A dwarf performer at the Edinburgh fringe festival had to be rushed to hospital after his penis got stuck to a vacuum cleaner during an act that went horribly awry. Daniel Blackner, or "Captain Dan the Demon Dwarf", was due to perform at the Circus of Horrors at the festival known for its oddball, offbeat performances. The main part of his act saw him appear on stage with a vacuum cleaner attached to his member through a special attachment. The attachment broke before the performance and Blackner tried to fix it using extra-strong glue, but unfortunately only let it dry for 20 seconds instead of the 20 minutes required. He then joined it directly to his organ. The end result? A solid attachment, laughter, mortification and ... hospitalisation. "It was the most embarrassing moment of my life when I got wheeled into a packed AE with a vacuum attached to me," Blackner said. "I just wished the ground could swallow me up. Luckily, they saw me quickly so the embarrassment was short-lived."
Things to do today: 1. have shorts hemmed up 2. steal shoes from doll at Toys R Us 3. cut legs off chair 4. glue vacume cleaner to weiner
" CRAAAAZZZY GLLUE" thousands of uses! Let's see, i can cut my willy off with an exacto knife bleed to death then when they find me I won't have to answer alot of questions or just die of embarassment in the ER
So... The main part of his act has him on stage with his member in a vacuum... and going to the hospital embarrasses him? "I just wished the ground could swallow me up..."