Controversal Subject ... sex ed, birth control, abortion.

Discussion in 'Survival of the Fittest' started by tacmotusn, Dec 13, 2017.

  1. tacmotusn

    tacmotusn Mosquito Sailor Site Supporter+

    Full article if you click the link. Partial excerpt printed below. Tac

    Forget abortion: What women in Appalachian Kentucky really want
    Issues addressed from a perspective alien to most of us. It is worth a read at the very least. I take no strong stand on this issue as I have almost no dog in the fight at all, but my mind and my eyes are always open and gathering data. Tac

    Perhaps it was the abstinence pledge she felt forced to sign or the promise ring she was told to slip on her finger. But from the moment Cheryl became sexually active, she felt dirty.

    Then, three boys raped her, reducing her self-image to mud.

    She didn't dare tell anyone or seek help. Growing up in rural eastern Kentucky, she'd been raised by drug addicts who'd lost the family home and lived in a place, she says, where there was "nothing left to do but do each other."

    Shame kept Cheryl, who wants to be identified only by a pseudonym, from even stepping foot into her hometown's health department. A year of untreated chlamydia stole her fertility.
    "I wish I hadn't been so scared," says Cheryl, now 20 and a University of Pikeville student who hopes to be an attorney someday. "I will never be able to have a family. I wish the way I'd learned about my own body and sex in general had been different."

    Here, where the Bible Belt cinches tight around Central Appalachia and small-town living means everyone knows your business, matters of sexuality and reproductive health are traditionally talked about in whispers -- if they're talked about at all.

    But pull back the kudzu, and you'll hear voices crying out for change, even as the political winds howl against them.
    That is the end of the trailer for the article. Read it or not. your choice. Tac
    chelloveck likes this.
  2. oil pan 4

    oil pan 4 Monkey+++

    This is what happens when you teach people, especially women for some reason, that "down there is bad" and that's pretty much all the information you give them on the subject.
    I don't' see how any one could expect any other outcome than a lot of situations like this.
    chelloveck and tacmotusn like this.
  3. snake6264

    snake6264 Combat flip flop douchebag

    The truth is out there.....
  4. Motomom34

    Motomom34 Moderator Moderator

    So what they want is this:
    The Appalachian area of Kentucky sounds poor and should qualify for all that. Small town gossip is not going to stop whether they have that stuff or not. Actually I am not really clear on the point of the article other then I think they want free birth control, abortions, sex ed (which they get in school) and for someone to say sex is okay.
    tacmotusn likes this.
  5. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

    Reading the full article, I get this -
    "Their goal? To launch a comprehensive birth-control access campaign in southeastern Kentucky, where teen birth rates outpace the national average." In other words, choice.
    Looks like the rest of the bolts (however diluted) are already in their quiver.
  6. arleigh

    arleigh Goophy monkey

    I did not harp on sex ,but I did teach my children about sex With all the information available at the time .
    Though you can't force some one to use good sense ,at least if you arm them initially, they can't say they weren't told .
    My parents told me nothing about sex ,what I learned was from sex ed in school and medical books and pamphlets that were available . That and I had an interest in microbiology of my own ,all life is a fascination for me .
    tacmotusn and Bandit99 like this.
  7. oil pan 4

    oil pan 4 Monkey+++

    Obviously if that small town rumor mill was worth a damn you would know who had the jack and not get it from that person.

    There are still people who think if they don't tell their kids about it or tell them down there is bad and drag them to church every sunday they will wait till they are married to have sex.
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2017
  8. Bandit99

    Bandit99 Monkey+++ Site Supporter+

    First, I think @tacmotusn is a tough old buzzard to bring this subject up. It's a touchy one...

    I, like Tac, 'don't have a dog in this fight' but I do have a history concerning it since my son was born when I just turned 16 and his mother was still 15 so I do have a very hardline personal opinion based on my personal life which was made even tougher (and God knows it was tough enough already) due to this event. Fortunately, we both managed to come out okay in our lives but it wasn't easy and we were very, very lucky.

    My personal opinion is 'an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.' I believe that abstinence is not a reliable method to keep an unwanted pregnancy from your door and - yes - I know that sounds looney; however, some young people will not be able to stop themselves from experimenting. They simply will not be able to stop themselves and you can call it a weakness, curiosity, or call it excessive hormones or, if you really want to be a moron, you can call them bad girls and boys but they will have sexual intercourse.

    Once one understands this and can do so without being judgmental then one can begin to provide a workable solution. A clear and well defined sex education classes should be a starting point at school and/or at home. I said classes - plural - because the topics need to be addressed in detail and reinforced: STDs, pregnancy, birth control... When should those classes start? No idea...earlier the better but certainly not before they can comprehend what they are being told.

    Americans have made sex (actually, the human body) taboo but it is part of our everyday life in films, advertisements, dress, songs... The is nothing taboo about it. It is a natural state of things. It is much different in other parts of the world, it's simply accepted as part of being human.

    I also think birth control, from condoms to pills, should be accessible but I do not have an opinion if they should be acceptable without a parent's permission. I think that is out-of-my-lane and I or any government should not be the deciding factor. I would state that if I had had access to them then I would have used them - period.

    At 16-years old, when my niece (like a daughter to me) started going to discos and dating and wearing more adult type clothes, I gave her a hand full of condoms one evening and a chat about sex and told her that she should keep two within her purse at all times and I would be checking (I did too). She started crying and said, "But, I'm a good girl!" whereas I replied "Yes, you are but sometimes good girls have sex also." In that country, birth control was extremely easily to obtain even if one wanted pills but I wanted to ensure my girls were protected so I took it upon myself.

    We also discussed sex openly - no taboos - I mean, they're both healthy and very pretty young ladies so... Perhaps, it was much easier because they were not American girls, I will never know, but, no unplanned pregnancies, no STDs and they both finished university and both have professional jobs with one being married. They both had numerous boyfriends (much as I hated it! LOL!) but we never pried into their sex lives. Their sex life was private however I considered ensuring their practice and understanding of 'safe sex' was mine.

    EDIT: I agree with MM34 as did not think much of the article, perhaps poorly written, as still unclear what idea(s) or the main topic was the author was trying to get across.

    EDIT: I realize that I did not give an opinion on abortion. This was done on purpose and hope I made it clear that I prefer 'prevention.' However, if I was pushed into a corner, I believe the final decision should be left to the mother carrying the child not the government and certainly not society; however, pregnancy in a minor is a different problem all together and I have no comment/opinion as part of me says the parent should have final say but that minor will not always be a minor and this is a life changing event and they are indeed the one who will pay the price not the parent.
    Last edited: Dec 13, 2017
  9. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    I grew up with sex being a healthy issue and lots of cousins willing to teach me all about it. We never let the bible belt influence what came naturally but we did learn to be careful and I find it hard to relate to people that are so stuck on biblical damnation for just a little innocent fun. If you are female and I am attracted to you, I'm gonna hit on you and it you don't want to recipacate, that's ok, I don't mind, but I might turn your world upside down. I enjoy sex, good healthy, safe sex, and find it a lot more enjoyable than sitting around playing couch commando. I am gentleman and polite to the extreme, but I will get into your panties in heartbeat and make no apologies about it. I am a wolf in wolf's clothing and I will wolf you with no remorse.
  10. UncleMorgan

    UncleMorgan I eat vegetables. My friends are not vegetables.

    Early in my wife's career as an ER Nurse, she had a really sad case come in: A young woman from a very strict family turned 21--and decided on that Very Special Day that she could finally do something her parents had completely forbidden all her life.

    Sex? No.

    She went to a bar, and got totally stinkin' drunk. And then she tried to drive home. She hit a power pole and died on the scene.

    I consider her death her parent's fault because they could have taught her better--but chose not to.

    Years later, when our kids were hitting their teens, I made damn sure they knew what booze was, how it worked, and how it affected them. I gave them drinking lessons--including the one were they got wall-eyed, tried to take a shower fully dressed, and puked on their shoes. And I took pictures to show them what they looked like.

    Neither of them ruined their lives with alcohol, because when the opportunities arose they knew how to not let that happen. They didn't drive drunk, either. They has seen what happens to drunk drivers.

    For years, within his circle of friends, my son was the Designated Driver. And highly respected as such.

    So, what does all this have to do with sex?

    Nothing and everything.

    Fundamentally, stupid drinking and stupid sex are very much alike.

    They spring from ignorance. And with both, ignorance can be life-destroying.

    When my kids got to the Inquisitive Age, I encouraged them to learn everything they could about sex.

    I gave them Required Reading: Everything from the Kama Sutra to The Joy of Sex. Plus a lot of college-level biology. And Sex and the Single Girl--who could ever forget that classic?

    Because they were intelligent and well-educated, they avoided most of the pitfalls that the mid-teen to mid-twenties crowd almost automatically fall into.

    I knew they knew I had done the right thing when they both thanked me thirty years later.

    Almost all of the worst evils in this world spring directly from the systematic imposition of ignorance on good people by bad people. It doesn't matter what the subject is: enforced ignorance is a fundamental tool of Evil.
    Bandit99, Motomom34 and tacmotusn like this.
  11. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    I first learned about sex on the ranch and in FFA animal husbandry classes....... country boys....thick headed.
    Then we got interested in country girls.....all rules went out the door. ;)
  12. oil pan 4

    oil pan 4 Monkey+++

    I have always wonder about that.
    For example NM law says that you are not allowed give anyone under 21 any alcohol.
    So, a person is now 21, it was going to happen eventually, they probably don't live with their parents, they never had alcohol before, yay the state law was a success. Now you have a person who is 21, possibly lives by them selves, can go to bars and buy alcohol and has no idea what it's going to do to them, they don't know their limit or how they will react.
    How is this scenario supposed to end well?
    Bible thumper logic.
    Works if you don't think about it.
  13. Bandit99

    Bandit99 Monkey+++ Site Supporter+

    @UncleMorgan Yes! Exactly! 'stupid drinking and stupid sex...spring from ignorance.' While one will see 'stupid drinking' in other parts of the world by young people, it is far less and the reason is because they are taught to drink, its results and its consequences and especially the evils that can occur in over indulgence.

    Having lived in countries for numerous years that have zero tolerance for drinking and driving, I would never consider getting behind the wheel even after one beer. It just doesn't make sense to do so. I find it strange since the USA has so many laws, way too many, that they continue to tolerate this. I don't get it. Why leave a margin for error? I admit I don't understand their reasoning as it would be a much easier law to enforce, defines the law much better for the citizen, and seems the logically approach.
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