Cows With Guns

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by 3M-TA3, Sep 3, 2014.


  1. 3M-TA3

    3M-TA3 Cold Wet Monkey


     
  2. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    Singing that silly song while grilling porterhouses...I like it.
     
  3. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    Dana Lyons - Cows With Guns Lyrics
    Artist: Dana Lyons

    Album: Cows With Guns

    Genre: Folk

    Heyo! SONGLYRICS just got interactive. Highlight. Review: RIFF-it.
    RIFF-it good.
    [​IMG]Send "Cows With Guns" Ringtone to your Mobile[​IMG]
    Listen while you read!
    Fat and docile, big and dumb
    They look so stupid
    They aren't much fun
    Cows aren't fun

    They eat to grow
    Grow to die
    Die to be at
    At the hamburger fry
    Cows well done

    Nobody thunk it
    Nobody knew
    No one imagined
    The great cow guru
    Cows are one

    He hid in the forest
    Read books with great zeal
    He loved Che Guevera
    A revolutionary veal
    Cow Tse Tongue

    He spoke about justice
    But nobody stirred
    He felt like an outcast
    Alone in the herd
    Cow doldrums

    He mooed we must fight
    Escape or we'll die
    Cows gathered around
    'Cause the steaks were so high
    Bad cow pun

    But then he was captured
    Stuffed into a crate
    Loaded onto a truck
    Where he rode to his fate
    Cows are bummed

    He was a scrawny calf
    Who looked rather woozy
    No one suspected
    He was packing an Uzi
    Cows with guns

    They came with a needle
    To stick in his thigh
    He kicked for the groin
    He pissed in their eye
    Cow well hung

    Knocked over a tractor
    And ran for the door
    Six gallons of gas
    Flowed out on the floor
    Run cows run

    He picked up a bullhorn
    And jumped up on the hay
    We are free roving bovines
    We run free today

    We will fight for bovine freedom
    And hold our large heads high
    We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
    Cows with guns

    They crashed the gate
    In a great stampede
    Tipped over a milk truck
    Torched all the feed
    Cows have fun

    Sixty police cars
    Were piled in a heap
    Covered in cow pies
    Covered up deep
    Much cow dung

    Black smoke rising
    Darkening the day
    Twelve burning McDonalds
    Have it your way

    We will fight for bovine freedom
    And hold our large heads high
    We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
    Cows with guns

    The President said
    "Enough is enough
    These uppity cattle
    It's time to get tough"
    Cow dung flung

    The newspapers gloated
    Folks sighed with relief
    Tomorrow at noon
    They would all be ground beef
    Cows on buns

    The cows were surrounded
    They waited and prayed
    They mooed their last moos
    They chewed their last hay
    Cows out gunned

    The order was given
    To turn cows to whoppers
    Enforced by the might
    Of ten thousand coppers

    But on the horizon
    Surrounding the shoppers
    Came the deafening roar
    Of chickens in choppers

    We will fight for bovine freedom
    And hold our large heads high
    We will run free with the Buffalo, or die
    Cows with guns


    Read more at DANA LYONS - COWS WITH GUNS LYRICS
     
    magnus likes this.
  4. Tully Mars

    Tully Mars Metal weldin' monkey

    One of my all time favs!
     
  5. magnus

    magnus Monkey

    Too funny.
     
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