Dumbest thing you heard from a non survivialist?

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CANDY fISHER, Feb 13, 2011.

  1. You know my husband works for a food distributor , we do not have to worry, he packs foods all day

    0 vote(s)
  2. I'm glad I hate when people go the extremes and tell folks to stock up, they just scare people

  3. This president is the first one that has made me feel like I'm safe and I leave my life in his hands

  4. Can I come live with you when there is no food left? Will you make me sugar cookies? hehehe


    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    So I tell folks, prepare, it does not hurt to have 3 to 6 months worth the food stored, maybe even a years worth if you can, I get these dumb remarks back....

    1. You know my husband works for a food distributor , we do not have to worry, he packs foods all day.

    2. Im glad I live in a country that we have plenty, I hate when people go the extremes and tell folks to stock up, they just scare people.

    3.this president is the first one that has made me feel like Im safe and a true american and I leave my life in his hands.

    4.Can I come live with you when there is no food left? will you make me sugar cookies?????????? heheheheeeeeee

    yeah ummmm no I will be locking my door!
  2. Brokor

    Brokor Live Free or Cry Moderator Site Supporter+++ Founding Member

    I get #4 a lot. From the look I return, they understand that they are not welcome.
  3. chelloveck

    chelloveck Diabolus Causidicus

    Suggar Cookies and beverages

    You could possibly say...." sure......all the sugar cookies you like....and the special Koolaid to wash them down".... : O

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    I like this one...
    Well the red cross and fema will always be there, we pay there wages ( taxes) and there is always claiming a state of emergency.


    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

  6. Brokor

    Brokor Live Free or Cry Moderator Site Supporter+++ Founding Member

    This one is popular: "Why do you store food? I have enough for a few days, and when I run out I will just make a trip to the grocery store."

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    I get this one a lot

    hey, I live from pay check to pay check, I have no extra money.... I always tell them heck so do I but it does not take a lot of money to put a few things away here and there . after all you suck down a 5.00 coffee every morning from star bucks! smoke 2 packs of cigerettes a day, and on friday night you party like 1999

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    I get that one all the time!!! then I say well what if the store is empty.......... well then I will find one that is not.... ;)
  9. UGRev

    UGRev Get on with it!

    My favorite is.. "Are you some kind of p***y that you need a gun? what are you afraid of.. be a man".. My reply is usually "I have the gun, you don't.. who's afraid of who now?"

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    or this one.... hey if your a christian, why do you need a gun?? really if you were a christian you would never think of having one, or saving up food since God provides all your needs....

    gee wonder why god gave me the brains and the enlightenment to wake up and smell the coffee or wake up and see whats going on around me.
    sure my God does provide for me, heck he answers my prayers all the time, but he also gave me a mind and good sense and my senses tell me crap is going to go down hill soon and why not get ready for it? .
    Hazy Davey likes this.
  11. Gator 45/70

    Gator 45/70 Monkey+++

    Start a poll...#4 Get's my vote...
  12. melbo

    melbo Hunter Gatherer Administrator Founding Member

    you can't eat it

    poll added
  13. Equilibrium

    Equilibrium Monkey++

    No vote for me on the poll. There's no option to choose other. Even my friends that are still liberals don't believe the Feds have enough money to help everyone if another Katrina type event hits right about now so I'm not hearing any comments about FEMA taking care of them well.... that excludes one brother and SIL out in CA.... they've told me they're not starting a pantry because they're "covered".... whatever...may the force be with them.
    I've been mentioning that I've started a pantry to others outside my immediate family and personal friends.... just in case. I think it's important as many of us as possible share details about what we're doing and why.... within reason. Some think it's a great idea and will ask questions about what I'm buying or how I got started. I let them know I moved out every non-essential kitchen gadget and appliance like waffle irons and baking dishes down to the basement to make way for the dehydrated and canned goods I started picking up weekly and that before I knew it.... I had a full one-week supply of food and water for 5 and that my next goal was a one month supply. Which is the truth. If they assume all we have is one week's worth of pantry items for 5, I'm perfectly fine with that.... let them show up at someone else's door when SHTF. The rest who reply to my statement that I've started a pantry are pretty much split about 50/50. I have to be honest... I'm not finding anything amusing in their replies. I'm either getting "just in case what" (as if I'm planning for an alien or zombie invasion) or "you're not one of those conspiracy theorists are you". I don't have a pat response for these people. It's more what ever comes out of my mouth at the time which.... depends on non-verbal cues I pick up on from the person as well as how much time I have. Most everyone around here knows full well we ALL live in tornado alley and we've all been subjected to frequent power outages as a result of 100 year and 500 year flood events and we're ALL on a fault line....sooo..... I've been rather forward letting replies roll off my tongue in response to some of these ding dongs who would have others in ear shot believe I'm off my rocker or that they have absolutely positively no recall of local outage events let alone the events of Katrina that were broadcast to the world. I guess it's more my replies to them that can be humorous if I'm in a playful mood otherwise I cut them off.... and rather abruptly and publicly I might add.... from taking another verbal cheap shot at me.

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    [fnny] Love the poll LMAO
    Lib ( do not know your name hon) your right, I have told tons of folks, and i get the same crapola, your not one of those conspiracy theorists are you? or wait, nothings going to happen, you guys are always thinking gloom and doom.
    Yep hear it all the time. I have a love for people, I do not want to see them hungry or worse dead. I want them to make wise decisions and to plan ahead.
    Ive never been the sharpest tack, but I have always been a survivor! I have always thought of what if's , loss of job, income etc. and I have always had enough food for a few months, now Im more into a year or way more.looking for the long haul and even farther ahead) but im late in this game, I did not see until over a month ago how bad things were, or how hard I had to work to get stuff in quick. I think Im doing a darn good job, but man I got lots more to go. thank God Im always thinking ahead any way and have months in advance meds, I have stock piles of allergy meds, and so forth. now I must reign in the wheat, more rice more milk and more things to make big pots of goods, Stews , soups, chili etc.
  15. Equilibrium

    Equilibrium Monkey++

    Lib's fine. EQ's fine.... I'll always know when you're talking to me. ;)
    So you're not the sharpest tack and I'm not the brightest crayon in the box.... oh well... here's to the black horses in this "race". I'm not a gambler at all but if I had to.... I'd bet my money on anyone prepping who has a firearm.
    I'm talking openly about our pantry and other recent purchases with our kids. Are you? I don't mean laying it all out for an 8 or a 10 year but more so exposure to the basics in an age appropriate manner so they're provided with "tools" to cope should any type of poopies start hitting the fan. We actually had a rather interesting conversation this week when one of our sons pointed out what he believed was an oversight... no cat food in our pantry. That was no oversight. Probably not an appropriate topic for an 8 or 10 year old but most appropriate for 14+. When we don't even have 2 mos of pantry foods for us.... we're not going to allocate precious family resources toward the purchase of even one 20 lb bag of Iams for the cats. If we had a year's worth of long term storage items plus 1 years worth of shorter term storage items then maybe.... we could consider adding cat food to the pantry. But we don't... not even close.
  16. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    The cats and dogs are potential sources of food themselves in my house. I got got reciepes for weinerdog, just in case.
  17. Gray Wolf

    Gray Wolf Monkey+++

    My cats are more than just pets, without them, it would be impossible to keep the garden from being overrun with pests, so there is some food stored for them too. Dog also has work to do around the homestead.
    It takes time to build a decent food storage pantry, probably the easiest way is "copy canning". You buy the same stuff that you actually use, and add one or two more than what you will use between shopping trips. Just be sure to rotate your foods using the oldest stuff first.
  18. Falcon15

    Falcon15 Falco Peregrinus

    I do not advertise the fact that I am storing food/other preps. I did ask some family members if they were stocked up on essentials (food, water, etc.), just in case we have a Hurricane (good example of a local SHTF scenario - Miami, after hurricane Andrew took months to get basic services back online - same with NO after Katrina, about a month for Houston, after Ike). I was given the fish-eye (they did not reply) and asked if I was prepared for an emegency. My answer was, I am working on it, but I barely have enough for the family. They proceeded to tell me that they were not "worried" and had "enough on hand" to last them a week or so. When I chat with others (always mindful of OPSEC), I ask what if questions: What if you lost your job tomorrow and had no prospects? Standard answer - I'll get a job pretty quick, I think, so I am not worried. I sit back and think to myself - in this economy? You are kidding yourself, at best.

    Personally, my OPSEC keeps me from divulging a lot to non-preppers. Call me names, deride me if you will, but I would rather not have to shoot a "friend" over a box of pop-tarts post SHTF - because frankly, my family comes first. I will give till it hurts, we have what we call "charity kits" - 1# each beans, rice, sugar, salt. 7 individual serving packs of coffee, soap, basic hygiene products (sample toothpaste tubes, a couple of cheap toothbrushes, 4 yards of floss, some feminine products) and enough Calcium Hypochlorite (with directions) to make 30 gallons of strong bleach (for water purification). In addition to that we have extra clothing, shoes, boots, plus handmade crocheted items (scarfs, hats etc.) for barter/charity. We are also armed to the teeth (including the kids), and will defend ourselves against looters etc.
  19. Equilibrium

    Equilibrium Monkey++

    Gray Wolf> If you could borrow one of these to give it a test spin I believe you might find it to be superior for garden protection... second only to native snakes, Non-poisonous mouse control; home rodent control remedies: RatZapper. Definitely less costly to "own and operate" and they don't pose a threat to public health. ;) We can use rechargeable batteries in them too!!!
    [FONT=&quot]CANDY> Read between the lines what Falcon is saying. Have you ever fed a dumped cat before? They don't go away once you feed them. The dumped cats we've fed all ended up in our home as permanent residents... I think the same thing would happen if we started feeding people in the aftermath of a long term event. It's going to break my heart but.... I will say no. I have about 5 weeks worth of pantry items for us....maybe 6/7 tops if we scrounge through every cupboard. I know I'm at least 3 months away from my goal of having a 6 month pantry for us. There's no way I could share any food if any outage is long term unless the person standing at our door is a child who just lost both parents in a shooting and that's unlikely since this is a small neighborhood with only one kid that I know of younger than our youngest. Now.... if all indicators are an event is a short term situation where I'm going to be in a position to replace any food items I'd be passing out.... I'd happily share a gallon of water from the back of one of our toilets, 1/2 carton of eggs, and a few dehydrated foods with neighbors/elderly/widows/pregnant women/etc along with written instructions on how to use what I give them simply because most of what I've got is dehydrated. While I'm hand writing instructions.... the person will be receiving an admonition to start their own pantry IMMEDIATELY. When I hand them the dehydrated goods and the directions, they will be told there won't be a second time and that they might as well just call the PD…what’ll be left of it and….. get a ride to a shelter before showing up at our front door again for food. I realize this sounds harsh but.... I will not waver.[/FONT]

    CANDY fISHER Monkey+

    As a christian, I can not turn folks away, no Im not advertising either lol, but if I see a need I must give. that's what Im all about. I have 3 dogs, been buying dog food for them to and have 6 months worth so far. there my babies and I love them and will not let them suffer or have to kill them. I will do the best I can and get what I can in, beans are cheap, rice is cheap. I also have mom and dad and nephew. All I can do is pray things don't go bad and I have a lot in when it finally does. I started my big bulk stuff today, 25 pounds tvp and 5 gallon bucket wheat. I will be getting another 3 buckets and a grinder on my next check. I am also looking at a bucket of honey. I guess what Im doing is trying to feed a bulk food ( stews, chili's and soups ) so getting things I can add to make big kettles of the stuff. Cans are fine but with so many to feed, thats a lot of cans. If I can get in tons of freeze dried and canned veggies I can do pots of foods instead of cans and cans of foods.
    I plan on getting the large cans of stews, and chili's and large cans of foods so it goes farther. I also plan on getting the # 10 cans of fruits. with so many to feed the canned fruit will be a tasty treat. I got lots of spam, and turkey in a can, and plan to get tons more. i think a nice sandwich and hot soup will be pretty filling.
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