Engineer Terminology

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CRC, Jul 4, 2006.


  1. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    well? ghrit?? :lol:




    1. A NUMBER OF DIFFERENT APPROACHES ARE BEING TRIED - We are
    still pissing in the wind.


    2. EXTENSIVE REPORT IS BEING PREPARED ON A FRESH APPROACH TO
    THE PROBLEM - We just hired three kids fresh out of college.


    3. CLOSE PROJECT COORDINATION - We know who to blame.


    4. MAJOR TECHNOLOGICAL BREAKTHROUGH - It works OK, but looks
    very hi-tech.


    5. CUSTOMER SATISFACTION IS DELIVERED ASSURED - We are so far
    behind schedule the customer is happy to get it delivered.


    6. PRELIMINARY OPERATIONAL TESTS WERE INCONCLUSIVE - The damn
    thing blew up when we threw the switch.


    7. TEST RESULTS WERE EXTREMELY GRATIFYING - We are so surprised
    that the stupid thing works.


    8. THE ENTIRE CONCEPT WILL HAVE TO BE ABANDONED - The only
    person who understood the thing quit.


    9. IT IS IN THE PROCESS - It is so wrapped up in red tape that
    the situation is about hopeless.


    10. WE WILL LOOK INTO IT - Forget it! We have enough problems
    for now.


    11. PLEASE NOTE AND INITIAL - Let's spread the responsibility
    for the screw up.


    12. GIVE US THE BENEFIT OF YOUR THINKING - We'll listen to what
    you have to say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we've
    already done.


    13. GIVE US YOUR INTERPRETATION - I can't wait to hear this
    bull!


    14. SEE ME or LET'S DISCUSS - Come into my office, I'm lonely.


    15. ALL NEW - Parts not interchangeable with the previous
    design.


    16. RUGGED - Too damn heavy to lift!


    17. LIGHTWEIGHT - Lighter than RUGGED.


    18. YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - One finally worked.


    19. ENERGY SAVING - Achieved when the power switch is off.


    20. LOW MAINTENANCE - Impossible to fix if broken.
     
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