Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Seacowboys, Mar 1, 2007.

  1. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    THE YEAR'S BEST (actual) HEADLINES OF 2006:

    Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says
    [No, really ?]

    Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
    [Now that's taking things a bit far!]

    Crack Found on Governor's Daughter
    [Imagine that!]

    Is There a Ring of Debris around Uranus?

    Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over
    [What a guy!]

    Miners Refuse to Work after Death
    [No-good-for-nothing' lazy so-and-sos!]

    Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
    [See if that works any better than a fair trial!]

    War Dims Hope for Peace
    [I can see where it might have that effect.]

    If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile
    [You think?]

    Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures
    [Who would have thought...]

    Enfield (London) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide
    [They may be on to something!]

    Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges
    [You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?]

    Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge
    [He probably IS the battery charge.]

    New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group
    [Weren't they fat enough?]

    Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
    [That's what he gets for eating those beans.]

    Kids Make Nutritious Snacks
    [Do they taste like chicken?]

    Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half
    [Chainsaw Massacre all over again!]

    Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors
    [Boy, are they all tall!!]

    Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
    [Did I read that sign right?]
  2. RightHand

    RightHand Been There, Done That RIP 4/15/21 Moderator Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    Reminds me of my favorite from a local paper

    "Board of Directors make offer to Screw Stockholders"

    The company was American Screw
  3. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

  4. ChemicalGal

    ChemicalGal Monkey+++

    They were all good, but this was the best
  5. RightHand

    RightHand Been There, Done That RIP 4/15/21 Moderator Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    That was in the Willimantic Chronicle, Willimantic CT during the 70s. The paper still has a framed copy of this page in their office with a sign over it saying "Oops"
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