Home Security

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Ganado, Jun 18, 2015.

  1. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

    Home Security

    Now that I'm on a fixed income, I've disconnected my home alarm system,
    turned off my external lights and de-registered from the Neighbourhood Watch.

    I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front garden, one at each corner,
    and the black flag of ISIS in the centre.

    Local Police, Federal Police, the Army and all my neighbours are watching the house 24/7.
    I am watched everywhere I go.

    I've never felt safer, and I'm saving $149.50 a month
    laurin, Mountainman, jimLE and 15 others like this.
  2. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    Mindgrinder and Ganado like this.
  3. 3M-TA3

    3M-TA3 Cold Wet Monkey

    You could also paint a chalk outline like this in your driveway, scatter some used 44 mag brass around, and finish with remnants of a couple different types/ages of crime scene tape
  4. BTPost

    BTPost Stumpy Old Fart,Deadman Walking, Snow Monkey Moderator

    and a BIG Sign, "This Home protected by______________" and name your favorite Firearm Manufacturer......
    Ganado likes this.
  5. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

    Tracy, laurin, Mindgrinder and 3 others like this.
  6. chelloveck

    chelloveck Diabolus Causidicus

    In my neighbourhood, the demographic has changed considerably over the recent years.

    I would probably name my wifi "6 العملية فريق daesh afp " ;)

    Fighting terrorism - Australian Federal Police

    Actually it's a very peacable neighbourhood, and the folks are respectful and helpful...they have their version of the Jehovas Witnesses periodically door knocking with their equivalent to Jack Chick tracts; but I notice that their Quran thumpers seem to get as much interest as JWs do in non muslim neighbourhoods. Suits me.
    Ganado likes this.
  7. 3M-TA3

    3M-TA3 Cold Wet Monkey

    My guest networks are:
    FBI Van 38
    OSP Relay 11
    Go Back to Class
    Study Now Or Flip Burgers Later

    OSP is the state police. I also live across the street from the local High School, so have left messages on both bands for those WiFi surfers in the parking lot.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 18, 2015
    laurin, Mountainman, Dont and 3 others like this.
  8. William Warren

    William Warren Monkey+++

    I love those!

    My all-time favorite: "... or flip burgers later". Genius!

    William Warren
    Ganado likes this.
  9. kellory

    kellory An unemployed Jester, is nobody's fool. Banned

    We have two of these within range now.
    Ganado likes this.
  10. Dont

    Dont Just another old gray Jarhead Monkey

    If I want WiFi out here I would have to go with a Sat. system...

    Names : Shoots at movement
    Fish's with dynamite
    Cloths? What for?
    Wish's for a Dungeon
    Can you squeel like a piggy

    Could give some folk's wandering around in the hill's caution..;)
    chelloveck, Ganado, 3M-TA3 and 2 others like this.
  1. Yard Dart
  2. Yard Dart
  3. Ganado
  4. Altoidfishfins
  5. HK_User
  6. Yard Dart
    Thread by: Yard Dart, Oct 23, 2018, 23 replies, in forum: Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions
  7. 3M-TA3
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  10. Asia-Off-Grid
    Thread by: Asia-Off-Grid, Jul 25, 2018, 10 replies, in forum: Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions
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  12. chelloveck
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