HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by RightHand, Jan 26, 2007.


  1. RightHand

    RightHand Pioneer in a New World Moderator Founding Member

    [FONT=verdana, courier new,courier,tahoma,sans-serif]HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FAST ANYMORE.
    George Phillips of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife
    told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see
    from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light,
    but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.
    He phoned the police, who asked "Is someone in your house?" and he said "no"
    Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock
    his door and an officer would be along when available.
    George said, "Okay," hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again.
    "Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my
    shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I've just shot
    them all." Then he hung up.
    Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response unit, and an
    ambulance showed up at the Phillips residence and caught the burglars red-handed.
    One of the Policemen said to George: "I thought you said that you'd shot
    them!"
    George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"
    [/FONT]
     
  2. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    [applaud]


    Good one , RH!!!
     
  3. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++

    Really like that one, wish it were true.
     
  4. monkeyman

    monkeyman Monkey+++ Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    I have....ummmm.....known of, calls like that made to the police to get them on scene quickly when didnt have time to wait. It dose work but they generaly dont see the humor in it.
     
  5. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    Too funny!
     
  6. E.L.

    E.L. Moderator of Lead Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    [own2]
     
  7. brotherpoop

    brotherpoop Monkey+++

    Re: HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FA

    Our side of town has the best view for our local city fireworks. A drunk wearing a red bandanna (wanna be gang member?) stopped in the street and began threatening me and my neighbor. I walked into the house and gabbed the cell phone as I walked to the back bedroom. I told the dispatcher, "A black male is threatening me and my neighbor and yelling at his buddies in the car to get out the guns."

    The dispatcher sarcastically asked, "Well did you see a gun."

    "No" I responded, "But I am in my own house now and I have retrieved my 9mm handgun and if he walks into my house I fear my life is in danger and I am going to shoot him."

    "What's the address again." She quickly asked.

    Apparently the guy and his buddies had been traveling about in several neighborhoods jumping out and threatening people. They had (3) 911 calls about them.
    They found them 2 miles away without any firearms in the car. All the police told me is they were all very drunk.
     
  8. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++

    Re: HOW TO CALL THE POLICE WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND DON'T MOVE FA

    Should've invited them in for a snack. :sneaky:
     
survivalmonkey SSL seal        survivalmonkey.com warrant canary
17282WuJHksJ9798f34razfKbPATqTq9E7