I Want A Marriage (Like They Had In The Bible)

Because the Bible tells me so!

 

Yeah and I want slaves.

 

I have thought of taking a 2nd for years. Just can't get the 1st on board. I had a brother in law who was in the middle east on business for a year and came back with a 2nd wife. 1st wife blew up. While polygyny is not legal here (really laughable as two dudes can be a "married couple") having a mistress/concubine is not. I'm about to retire, a trip to Thailand is on my bucket list.

 

I get a lot of inspiration from The Holy Bible myself. Robbing Peter to pay Paul is a phrase I use weekly. Older than Methuselah’s Aunt is another. Turn the other cheek isn’t so easy for me. I’m working on that one.

 

I guess I just don't get it. I love the women. BUT. Between my wife, her 3 sisters, my mother-in-law, my nieces, and other women who feel the need to direct and correct me... why would you want to add to the drama?

 

It's a pain in the ass.
It would be nice if successful people could grow extended families. That way single mom's dont have to shack up with losers. At least it would be another option.

 

I need two husbands. Then I could get twice as many projects around here completed.

OR, I could then listen to two men bitch about not wanting to do projects around here.

Never mind.

 

Turning the other cheek is required to transfer maximum power into your second punch. Jesus wants you to forgive, but he doesn't require you to be a wuss that gets pushed around, either, either.

 

Man, I got enough trouble with one wife, I couldn't imagine adding to the collection, one is plenty bad enough! Imaging getting bitched out by a few of them, and they would take turns! Then there's the "Honey Doos" I got enough problems keeping up with one list, imagine having two it more!
No thank you!

 

Send some knee-mail to Jesus and his dad...it's not as if they have any problems about humans owning chattel slaves (conditions apply).

Exodus 21:2 - 11
Exodus 21:20 - 21
Exodus 21: 26 - 27
Leviticus 25:44 - 46
Deuteronomy 15:12 - 18
Ephesians 6:5-8
1 Timothy 6:1-2
Luke12:47
Mathew 24:51

Just make sure that your slaves are not Israelites, but are purchased or captured from the tribes surrounding Israel and you're good to go. Owning Canadians as slaves would be perfectly acceptable...just that you may have to give Justin Bieber an occasional whipping if he's being a tad indolent.

 

No argument here. They were pretty pro slavery back in the bronze age.

 

So was god and his son. Those verses haven't been redacted, nor the divine commands repealed...though humans at least in some jurisdictions have outlawed the practice and made it illegal...something that god and his son didn't think to do back in the day.

Interestingly...god had nothing to say about same sex marriage, one way or another, though he had something to sayabout divorce.

 

God had a lot to say about same sex marriage, keep reading Chelloveck.

 

The marriage part nah Chello. He rained down meteorites on Sodom though. Ouch!!!!

 

I definitely do not need 2 husbands! It took me years to get the one I have perfected...

 

Perfected ,,, or tolerable ?????