Kids say the darndest things

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by VHestin, Jan 15, 2011.

  1. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    Noticed there wasn't a thread for people to post things they've heard kids say that would fit this category, and I was just reminded on Facebook of my own story when I was...well I don't remember my exact age, I was between the ages of 3 and 6 is all I know. Anyways, my mother and I were home alone, and she passes out on the toilet. I don't know this until the phone rings and she doesn't go answer it. I do, and it's one of her friends wanting to talk to her. Nothing I do is getting her to respond, and I'm a kid, I don't know what 'passed out' or 'unconscious' is, so I just tell her friend "Oh she's asleep now and she won't wake up. She'll have to call you back." CLICK! Mom told me years later that freaked her friend out so much they called 911.
  2. Allen

    Allen Monkey+

    Dear Santa.
    Let me explain, its not my fault. I found it that way.[BSf]
  3. beast

    beast backwoodsman

    from my oldest grandson when he was 3...
    "pa is it ok if i play in your truck"
    we found it downhill parked nose up a tree
  4. UGRev

    UGRev Get on with it!

    My 8 year old.

    Me: "Hey Mikey.. I need to make a few extra bucks.. what do you think we should do? "
    Mikey: "Hmm.. I don't know.. but I'm not sure printing any"..
    Me: "Uncontrollable laughter"
    beast likes this.
  5. Allen

    Allen Monkey+

    My daughter was 3 the first time I took her trick or treating, I had to hold her hand & drag her to the first few houses, then she caught on.
    The next night she came out of her room wearing her outfit, bucket in hand & said "Again".
    beast likes this.
  6. Seawolf1090

    Seawolf1090 Retired Curmudgeonly IT Monkey Founding Member

    A good fifteen years back or so, living in the rent-a-Hell singlewide I was in at that time, I had just gotten home from work. Ten year old neighbor kid walks over and asks with a perfectly straight face..... "Have you ever killed anybody?"

    Nearly floored me! :rolleyes:
  7. Sapper John

    Sapper John Analog Monkey in a Digital World

    When my son was a wee lad,he asked me if Whales sneezed...still trying to give him an answer over twenty years later!
  8. Falcon15

    Falcon15 Falco Peregrinus

    My eldest daughter was learning to go potty on a training chair. My daughter goes #2, gets up leans over and points into the chair and yells "Cookie!"

    Had guests over for dinner, when my eldest daughter was 5 - a couple of years ago. She looked at my friend (he and his wife were sitting across from her) and said in a very loud voice: "My daddy has a peni*, and he's bigger than you." We could not stop laughing for an hour straight.
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