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Letter from a Louisianna Farm Kid

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by melbo, May 30, 2007.

  1. melbo

    melbo Hunter Gatherer Administrator Founding Member



    Dear Ma and Pa,

    I am well. Hope you are. Tell Brother Walt and Brother Elmer the Marine
    Corps beats working for old man Minch by a mile. Tell them to join up quick
    before all of the places are filled.

    I was restless at first because you got to stay in bed till nearly 6 a.m.
    but I am getting so I like to sleep late. Tell Walt and Elmer all you do
    before breakfast is smooth your cot, and shine some things. No hogs to slop,
    feed to pitch, mash to mix, wood to split, fire to lay. Practically nothing.

    Men got to shave but it is not so bad, there's warm water. Breakfast is
    strong on trimmings like fruit juice, cereal, eggs, bacon, etc., but kind of
    weak on chops, potatoes, ham, steak, fried eggplant, pie and other regular
    food, but tell Walt and Elmer you can always sit by the two city boys that
    live on coffee. Their food, plus yours, holds you until noon when you get
    fed again. It's no wonder these city boys can't walk much.

    We go on "route marches," which the pl atoon sergeant says are long walks to
    harden us. If he thinks so, it's not my place to tell him different. A
    "route march" is about as far as to our mailbox at home. Then the city guys
    get sore feet and we all ride back in trucks.

    The country is nice but awful flat The sergeant is like a school teacher. He
    nags a lot. The captain is like the school board. Majors and colonels just
    ride around and frown. They don't bother you none.

    This next will kill Walt and Elmer with laughing. I keep getting medals for
    shooting. I don't know why. The bulls-eye is near as big as a chipmunk head
    and don't move, and it ain't shooting at you like the Higgett boys at home.
    All you got to do is lie there all comfortable and hit it. You don't even
    load your own cartridges . They come in boxes.

    Then we have what they call hand-to-hand combat training. You get to wrestle
    with them city boys. I have to be real careful though, they break real easy.
    It ain't like fighting with that ole bull at home. I'm about the best they
    got in this except for that Tug Jordan from over in Breau Bridge. I only
    beat him once. He joined up the same time as me, but I'm only 5'6" and 130
    pounds and he's 6'8" and near 300 pounds dry.

    Be sure to tell Walt and Elmer to hurry and join before other fellers get
    onto this setup and come stampeding in.

    Your loving daughter,

  2. Quigley_Sharps

    Quigley_Sharps The Badministrator Administrator Founding Member

    LOL nice
  3. kckndrgn

    kckndrgn Moderator Moderator Founding Member

  4. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    :lol: Alice. :lol:
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