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Male chauvinist pigs

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Conagher, Sep 3, 2005.


  1. Conagher

    Conagher Dark Custom Rider Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    Male chauvinist pigs

    Not recommended for thin skinned women!
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >Men strike back! ! ! ! ! !
    >
    >How many men does it take to open a beer?
    >
    >None. It should be opened when she brings it.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
    >
    >Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never
    >be able to support you.
    >
    >--------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >Why do women have smaller feet than men?
    >
    >It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
    >
    >them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
    >
    >When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me."
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >How do you fix a woman's watch?
    >
    >You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >Why do men fart more than women?
    >
    >Because women can't shut up long enough to
    >
    >build up the required pressure.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the
    >front door, who do you let in first?
    >
    >The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
    >
    >A woman who won't do what she's told
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >"Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
    >
    >a woman's sex drive by 90%."
    >
    >It's called a Wedding Cake.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >Why do men die before their wives?
    >
    >They want to.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >Women will never be equal to men until they can
    >
    >walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
    >
    >gut, and still think they are sexy.
    >
    >-------------------------------------------------------------------
    >
    >In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
    >
    >Then God created Man and rested.
    >
    >Then God created Woman.
    >
    >Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
     
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