Tango 3 is lying low for a day or two so I am stepping up to the plate. NASA ‘secret’ still safe, as are Nessie, Bigfoot On Tuesday, Americans will celebrate the 40th anniversary of one of the most amazing accomplishments in history: fooling the world into believing astronauts landed on the moon. The Apollo performance was the biggest government-sponsored cover-up since an alien ship making a crop-circle run was distracted by a Bigfoot sighting and crashed on a grassy knoll in Roswell, N.M. What makes the "moon landing" so impressive is that not once in the 40 years since the "One small step" video (shot in a secret desert location) aired around the globe has anyone involved breached the wall of silence vital to the immense conspiracy. Imagine the care that was taken in hiring the hundreds of people needed for sets, lighting, sound, acting and, of course, the all-important cleanup. Everyone involved has withstood intense scrutiny from family, friends and Matt Lauer to stick with the story that, oh yeah, we really sent guys to the moon to hop around and collect rocks. Kudos to those involved who carried the secret to the grave. Fortunately, inquiring minds can turn to the Internet for overwhelming evidence that blows the lid off the 32-ounce Big Gulp of deception that is the moon landing, along with photos of Nessie, Bigfoot and ugly little "goatsuckers." Careful observation of NASA photos and video clearly shows that shadows on the "moon" are wrong, there are no stars in the sky and the horizon is the same one used in The Truman Show. Besides, golf balls can’t slice and flags can’t wave without an atmosphere. If NASA hadn’t airbrushed it out, we certainly would have spotted Neil Armstrong’s pants on fire. So, keep the faith, truth-seekers. Someday the Roswell wreckage will be discovered in a secret location in the desert next to the retirement home of an aging Elvis. And remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day (although the pyramids were, with help from aliens) and gravity is just a theory.