Subject: Gordon fires entire pit crew <TABLE class=MsoNormalTable border=0 cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0><TBODY><TR><TD style="PADDING-BOTTOM: 0in; PADDING-LEFT: 0in; PADDING-RIGHT: 0in; PADDING-TOP: 0in" vAlign=top> Jeff Gordon fires the entire pit crew: This announcement followed Gordon's decision to take advantage of President Obama's scheme to employ Harlem youngsters. The decision to hire them was brought about by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths from Harlem were able to remove a set of wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Gordon's existing crew could only do it in 8 seconds with million-dollar high tech equipment. It was thought to be an excellent and bold move by Gordon's management team as most races are won or lost in the pits. However, Gordon got more than he bargained for! At the crew's first practice session, not only was the in- experienced crew able to change all 4 wheels in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had changed the paint scheme, altered the Vin number, and sold the car to Dale Jr. for 10 cases of Bud, a bag of weed, and some photos of Jeff Gordon's wife in the shower. Jeff was left sitting on his butt in a daze at the edge of the track. </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE>
