Politically correct means of referring to women and men --

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by ghrit, Dec 24, 2005.


  1. ghrit

    ghrit Old, mean, and nasty Administrator Founding Member

    HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

    1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED AMERICAN."

    2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is "VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."

    3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

    4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" -She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

    5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a "PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

    6 She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."

    7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets "CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED."

    8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is "MEDICALLY ENHANCED."

    9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

    10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED."

    11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - she is "PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."

    12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST PROVIDER."


    HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

    1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a "LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

    2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

    3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

    4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

    5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONALY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."

    6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes "ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."

    7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of "RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

    8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE EMPATHY."

    9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP CHALLENGED."

    10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."

    11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's "REAR CLEAVAGE."
     
  2. Cousin Jack

    Cousin Jack Knifemaker Founding Member

    :lol:

    I blew my naturally flavored, cherry, sodium free sparkling water out my nose after reading those!
     
  3. Conagher

    Conagher Dark Custom Rider Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    :lol: [ROFL] [beer]
     
  4. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    My Ad:

    Single, White, Overly-Caucasian, Sexually-Focused Guy with random temporary case of Rectal-Cranial Inversion in posession of small Liquid-Grain-Storage-Facility seeks Breasted-American who is Vocally-Appreciative while being Horizontally-Accessible. Sexually-Extroverted a plus. Prefer Non-Medically-Enhanced.

    :lol:



    Edit if Necessary.
     
  5. Conagher

    Conagher Dark Custom Rider Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    :lol: [bestpost]
     
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