Punny One

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by TailorMadeHell, Dec 18, 2006.


  1. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    Okay, here's one I found on a site. I liked it and thought it fit with all the others of it's type.


    A young man was in love with two women and
    could not decide which of them to marry.
    Finally he went to a marriage counselor.
    When asked to describe his two loves, he noted
    that one was a great poet and the other made
    delicious pancakes.
    "Oh," said the counselor, "I see what the problem
    is. You can't decide whether to marry for batter
    or verse."
     
  2. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    Insert groan
     
  3. gillman7

    gillman7 Monkey+++

    I think I have created a monster.........

    I love it![applaud]
     
  4. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++

    Ok, this pun stuff is gettin outta hand here! Stop the Madness!! ;)
     
  5. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    Just trying to do my best by putting the pun in punchline. [LMAO]
     
  6. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    Okay, Sea... One for intellect ([LMAO] bwahahaha):

    An Indian chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant.

    The first gave birth to a boy. The chief was so elated he built her a teepee made of deer hide.

    A few days later, the second gave birth, also to a boy. The chief was very happy. He built her a teepee made of antelope hide.

    The third wife gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details a secret. He built this one a two story teepee, made out of a hippopotamus hide.

    He challenged the tribe to guess what had occurred.

    Many tried, unsuccessfully. Finally, one young brave declared that the third wife had given birth to twin boys.

    "Correct," said the chief. "How did you figure it out?"

    The warrior answered, "It's elementary. The value of the squaw of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides."
     
  7. gillman7

    gillman7 Monkey+++

    OMG, we have Shakespearean puns, and now Geometric puns!!!!!!

    This is adding up to a great trend. I do not mean to subtract from this, but I don't see how this could possibly be divisive, but rather it will multiply our input and increase our intelligence exponentially.

    I stand in awe!!!!

    Masterful!!!!

    [LMAO] [applaud] [LMAO] [applaud] [LMAO] [applaud] [LMAO] [applaud] [LMAO] [applaud]
     
  8. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    Spoonerisms welcome here --
     
  9. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++


    Maht do you wean?
     
  10. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    Close --[fnny]
     
  11. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    Flutterby, dear butterfly.
     
  12. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    Spoonerism, can you figure it out? popcorn
     
  13. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member



    Uh...yeah...

    and no....I won't be copping any...... [LMAO]
     
  14. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    Mmmm Mmmm good. [pop] [LMAO]

    Just can't help myself. Had to add another pun.

    <center>[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Two caged canaries[/FONT]

    </center>[FONT=times new roman,helvetica]Once upon a time there were two canaries in a cage. Naturally, one was male and the other female. After many months, the male decided to meet the female. So he scooted over to her side of the cage and said,

    "Since we're in this together, why don't I move over to your side of the cage!"

    The female canary replied, "No, thanks!!"

    So he went back to his side but found he could stay there no longer. Once again, he moved to her side of the cage. This time he asked,

    "I am sorry I was to forward the first time. Why don't we get to know each other first."

    To which she replied again, "No, thanks!"

    Resigning himself to return to his side of the cage, he languished about for a bit then made one final effort. He went halfway across the cage and stated,

    "Well, could we at least talk?"

    This time she replied, "Oh, I am so sorry I have been so mean. You see I just learned I have a canarial disease called, "Chirpies" and I hear it is untweetable."


    Let the groaning begin. Haha.
    [/FONT]
     
  15. ghrit

    ghrit Ambulatory anachronism Administrator Founding Member

    Okay, here's the first GROAN!!! (And a moan for good measure---)
     
  16. Tango3

    Tango3 Aimless wanderer

    Then the old standby
    "I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than
    a frontal lobotomy"
     
  17. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

    [fnny]
    How about:

    She criticized my apartment, so I knocked her flat.
     
  18. Clyde

    Clyde Jet Set Tourer Administrator Founding Member

    A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket towards the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back. Oh my, I am so sorry, the woman says as she pops her eye back in place. "Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you, " she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theater followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed! ! Everything had been SO incredible! ! You know, he said, "you are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?" No, she replied, "You just happened to catch my eye."
    [kissit] :oops: [deadhorse]
     
  19. TailorMadeHell

    TailorMadeHell Lurking Shadow Creature

    [LMAO] [applaud] Sir, we've made contact and they are Punny. [touchdown]
     
  20. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    I was hoping someone would post something to tease my ears...


    that might ease my tears...









    you may groan now....
     
survivalmonkey SSL seal        survivalmonkey.com warrant canary
17282WuJHksJ9798f34razfKbPATqTq9E7