Religion & Bears..

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CRC, Apr 23, 2006.


  1. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    A Priest, a Pentecostal Preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains
    to the students of the University of Georgia in Athens.

    They would get together two or three times a week at the Varsity for
    coffee and to talk shop.

    One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
    really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.

    One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They
    would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to
    convert it.

    Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the "experience".

    Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has
    various bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, "I went into the woods
    to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from
    the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began
    to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him
    and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a lamb. The bishop
    is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

    Reverend Billy BOB spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm
    and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and
    brimstone oratory he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle.. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the time praising Jesus."

    They had met in the Rabbi's intensive care room. They both looked
    down at the rabbi. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. Rabbi Goldberg looks up and struggles to speak to the others. "Looking back on it,
    circumcision may not have been the best way to start things out......
     
  2. ghostrider

    ghostrider Resident Poltergeist Founding Member

    :eek: :rolleyes:
     
  3. Quigley_Sharps

    Quigley_Sharps The Badministrator Administrator Founding Member

    [raspberry]
     
  4. ColtCarbine

    ColtCarbine Monkey+++ Founding Member

  5. Conagher

    Conagher Dark Custom Rider Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    :lol: [LMAO]
     
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