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Rules to Enter Idaho

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Quigley_Sharps, Nov 3, 2005.

  1. Quigley_Sharps

    Quigley_Sharps The Badministrator Administrator Founding Member

    The following list of rules applies to each person as they enter Idaho.

    Learn 'em & remember 'em.

    1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.

    2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road". I drive a pickup truck because I need to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.

    3. They are horses, cattle & sheep. That's what they smell like to you. They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-80 goes east and west, I-84 goes north and south. Pick one.

    4. So you have a $60,000 dollar car. We're impressed. We have quarter-million dollar air conditioned tractors that we drive 3 weeks a year.

    5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's being friendly. Try to understand the concept.

    6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese are coming in, we WILL shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear at the time.

    7. Yeah, we eat Walleye & Rainbow Trout. You really want sushi & caviar? It's available at the corner bait shop.

    8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.

    9. We open doors for women. That is applied to all women, regardless of age

    10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak, or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.

    11. When we set out the spread on a table, there are three main dishes: meats, vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and A-1.

    12. You bring "coke" into my house - it better be brown, wet, and served over ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house - she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.

    13. High School Football is as important here as the Vikings or the Seattle Seahawks and a dang site more fun to watch.

    14. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the fish.

    15. Colleges? Try Idaho State University, University of Idaho or Boise State University. Students and graduates come outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.

    16. We have more folks per capita in the Navy, Army, Marines, and Air Force than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Idaho." If you do, prepare to get your butt kicked by the best.
  2. ghostrider

    ghostrider Resident Poltergeist Founding Member

    Red states and blue states
  3. melbo

    melbo Hunter Gatherer Administrator Founding Member

  4. RightHand

    RightHand Pioneer in a New World Moderator Founding Member

    I may come from a Blue state but I'm a Red state is disguise. I think I'd fit right in at Idaho.
  5. Quigley_Sharps

    Quigley_Sharps The Badministrator Administrator Founding Member

    I know you would RH
  6. TLynn

    TLynn Monkey+++ Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    I love it Quigley...unfortunately I think you need to take BSU out of there.

    Have you been to Boise lately and seen some of the students at the college???
    :lol: :lol: :lol:

    Other than that right on! I just love it when I can get a nice pretty Beemer or something all dirty because it's behind my old 4x4 (and the truck is filled with trash on the way to the dump). :D
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