She was scared

Well, you tried. It's all you can do. She'll either come back or she won't.
If she doesn't, I empathize. My husband and a friend disagreed over the Presidential election last year (he thinks the Mitt-wit is an idiot and I agree), and she stopped talking to him. She wouldn't even call him back and tell him why.

 

I would have said, "What's the big deal? I've been carrying for years. I thought you knew."

 

The paranoia IS unreasonable in reality but a solid construct in her mind. It may be simply liberal cultural conditioning in which case you may be against an near insurmountable wall. Insurmountable only in the sense that her fear may not even allow for rational dialogue. Like people who are afraid of ghost, spiders, mice, peanut butter and republicans, some fears seem to permanently warp the mind.

This should not however prevent you from at least trying.

 

Slightly OT. My BFF is afraid of guns and against "assault weapons and high cap magazines". She knows that I always CC and that doesnt bother her because she knows and trusts me. But of course, I'm the exception.

On that "assault weapon" thing a funny story. Recently one of her little Pomeranians was attacked in her yard by a neighbor dog. BFF finally got the attacking dog off hers and hers was badly rattled but not really hurt. Next day BFF got herself a baseball bat at goodwill to carry when she's out with the dogs, and I now tease her about going around "armed with an assault weapon". I asked her, if she had to beat off an attacking dog if she'd stop hitting it at precisely 10 times or just keep hitting it until it was no longer attacking? That was my argument.

 

I lost my friend. She never returned my calls, we never had breakfast again. I miss her but she put one issue before our friendship and all the other stuff we had in common. I hope someday she meets someone she trusts who will help her get over her fear.

 

It kind of freaks me out that people are so terrified of a gun.

Tell me are these people also terrified of the police?
Their equipment belt is covered with weapons and tools of oppression. When they do shoot and kill someone and if they go to trial only like 2% of them are found guilty of murder.

Are these people terrified of automobiles?
Assault vehicles kill far more people than guns and are only inches away from you while you wait to cross the road.
All you have to do is be freaked out by seeing a gun and walk out in front of a truck cause you are not paying attention and splat. Or be minding your own business at a cross walk waiting for the light to turn and get run over by a drunk driver.

Are they afraid of the medical industry?
We all should be.

Hammers, base ball bats, knives, fists and feet also kill thousands of people each year.

Or are they just that blissfully unaware in general?

 

Makes you wonder if peopl like that realize that I could kill them with a toothpick... or a spoon.. or a bucket of water... People that wana kill others do not need a gun to do it.... and the gun aint going to magicly kill you al by itself....

 

Some people seem to live in a delusional world where only a gun can kill them.

 

Sorry to hear of your loss. It also sounds like she wasn't much of a friend.

I guess you could have said - if she has a gun, she must be an off-duty cop.... But that doesn't do anything to fix her problem.
Like you say, perhaps she can get some help. Hoplophobia, the morbid fear of guns, can be disabling and lead to death by a robber or rapist....

 

All right I'll admit from age 6 to about 10 I was very scared of firearms.
The fear started to erode about age 8 when I got a bb gun.

 

I think I might ask her if she is afraid of a police man with a gun .
What if ,in deed she was a police woman under cover , what should you be afraid of then. Not her.
Also if I had the opportunity to meet the woman with a gun and in deed she is CCW , she should know, that " it's not." and if she is willing , introduce the two women so they can discuss the issue. Chances are woman to woman , she will have a more compelling influence on the ignorant.

 

Gosh B, cannot you pat me on the head and say something nice. It is kind of sad. She was a smart lady that knew gardening but somethings she just was scared of.

 

It's not the guns that freak me out its the people handling them. I've seen people at the range who are careless.

Don't point the damn thing unless your going to shoot. That means keeping the barrel pointed up or down and being aware of the barrel at all times..... people who don't do this freak me out.

In all honesty if you got rid of everyone you consider weak 3/4 of the population would be gone. Some people run towards the gun fire and others run away. You never know what someone is going to contribute.

 

Not that this would happen ,but it occurs to me that there are folks that are fearful to the extreme over things, and trying to overcome it too quickly, they choose to go extreme the other way , like the child afraid of a merry go round. once you finally get them interested they go nuts with it, and in reckless abandon and self proclaimed prophecy, really do get hurt ,confirming their original fears .
Usually, but not always ,it's parents that initially instill fear .
The mother that over reacts each time a lightening bolt flashes, teaches the kids the same fear though nothing has ever actually happened .
Not that lightening shouldn't be respected , but there are things you can do to calmly get out of it's way .
Habitually seeing people armed, is about the only way to see that ,just because people have guns ,doesn't mean they are all bad or all cops , there just people like you and me . well sort of .
If I was dating , one of the places I would go is to a shooting range , where I know that most people that are there, are usually are pretty responsible individuals.
That way she could see a lot of folk with guns, using them safely.
Don't push it ,
Require training if she is interested, and let it grow from there.
Most importantly "fallow all the rules your self"
The living demonstration of safe handling is the best teaching method. not verbal nor in books .

 

OK lil hitler

 

It's a shame. When you lose a friend over an issue like that, it hurts. I am sorry for your loss.
I have to think this fear is being programmed into our population, especially our youth, and most especially in our cities, where citizens are not as exposed to firearms and their legitimate uses.
I learned at an early age that the police could not protect me when I needed it, and society would not feed me when I was hungry.
In both cases, a rifle did the job. I used it effectively to protect myself and was proficient enough to feed myself.
I was 25 before I ever heard of someone using a shotgun for rabbits, and I thought it was an incredible waste!

 

Some people are just determined to be afraid of what most of us consider simply as tools.
At my IT job, I was widely known to always carry a large pocket knife, 4" blade. My data center chief borrowed it a couple times. No problem.
Once, a few of the girls were working on a project. They needed to cut something. One asks to borrow my knife. I pull it from my pocket, open it and hand it to her buttfirst.
Another gitl's eyes suddenly went wide, ans dhe was obviously scared. Oh crap....... Shecwas black, from a rough part of town. In her experience, only thugs carried knives.
I was more careful later to not do something that would freak her out.
But I never stopped carrying my knife.
NOBODY ever knew I had my CCW in my briefcase.

 

I'm not really sure being left without that "3/4 of the population" would be a bad thing...

But, then, I'm a known grumpy old man.