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Ten Thoughts to Ponder for 2009

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Quigley_Sharps, Feb 19, 2009.

  1. Quigley_Sharps

    Quigley_Sharps The Badministrator Administrator Founding Member

    Number 10
    Life is sexually transmitted.

    Number 9
    Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

    Number 8
    Men have two emotions:
    Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich .

    Number 7
    Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day,
    teach a person to use the internet
    and they won't bother you for weeks.

    Number 6
    Some people are like a Slinky ..
    Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile
    when you shove them down the stairs.

    Number 5
    Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday,
    lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

    Number 4
    All of us could take a lesson from the weather.
    It pays no attention to Criticism.

    Number 3
    Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200.00
    and a substantial tax cut saves you $30.00?

    Number 2
    In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird.
    Now the world is Weird and people take Prozac to make it normal..

    And The Number 1 Thought For 2009 :
    We know exactly where one cow with Mad-cow-disease is located among millions and millions of cows in America but we haven't got a clue as to where millions of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of Immigration?

  2. Conagher

    Conagher Dark Custom Rider Moderator Emeritus Founding Member

    Good post Quigs.............[applaud]
  3. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member


    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why the song?

    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural (just the opposite of the parts they cover)?

    Why do doctors leave the room while you disrobe?

    Why are actors in a movie, but on TV?

    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

    What disease did cured ham actually have?

    How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

    If you have sex with a prostitute during her off time, is it considered shoplifting?
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