the Elk hunt

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Rabid, Apr 13, 2013.

  1. Rabid

    Rabid Monkey

    It was late spring and I was already thinking about my fall elk hunt. My wife was pouting and complaining that every year I would go elk hunting and leave her at home alone. I told her it didn’t matter what she said I was still going hunting.
    She said well then take me with you. I thought about it for a moment and said “sure why not”. So I bought her a nice used rifle and took her to the range, she was a natural. After an hour she had a nice six inch group at 100 yards.
    Next we went out and got her a hunting outfit and boots. We followed that with the purchase of a pack and some other gear.
    Over the summer we backpacked to get in shape and spent a few hours a week at the shooting range. My wife and I had never been closer in our 17 years of marriage; this was almost too good to be true.
    We arrived at my favorite hunting area and I put my wife in my favorite spot and was about to move on to my own spot when she asked me, what does an elk look like?
    In all my excitement I had not even shown her a picture of an elk. I had always gotten cow tags, you can’t eat the horns, so all she ever saw was pack aged meat.
    I said, do you know what a deer looks like? She said yes. Then I told her that it looked a lot like a deer but it was much bigger and dark brown with a light patch on its rump. I said, you can’t miss it.
    I made my way about 600 yards down the trail in the darkness of the early morning, got settled in and waited for daylight. I was seated on the ground with my back against what was left of an old pine tree. It was almost light enough to shoot, where we come from if you can make out color it is light enough to shoot.
    Then I heard the crack of a rifle followed closely by a second shot. I got up and gathered my things together and hurried back toward my wife. As I neared I heard her arguing with a man. She was saying, its mine and he would come back with no lady, its mine. This went back and forth a few times and I slid behind a pine to watch how she would handle this, always ready to step in should things get out of hand.
    He looks like he is about to cry, I know she has him beat. Way to go Hun I said under my breath. One last volley she says I shot it, I want it, its mine! Thoroughly defeated he says to her, oh alright but at least let me get my saddle off it.
    I never did come out from behind that pine tree, I just slinked back to my spot.
  2. hidden211

    hidden211 And thats no BULL!!!!!!

  3. Tracy

    Tracy Insatiably Curious Moderator Founding Member

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