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The most prepared man in the world!

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by Oddcaliber, Jan 27, 2018.

  1. Oddcaliber

    Oddcaliber Monkey++

    A humorous take on the most interesting man in the world. The most prepared man in the world,his first aid kit is a hospital. He casts so many bullets he owns a lead mine. His fresh water source is the Great Lakes. Disaster avoids him. Feel free to add more!
  2. ghrit

    ghrit Bad company Administrator Founding Member

    He is his own FFL.
  3. BTPost

    BTPost Stumpy Old Fart Snow Monkey Moderator

    and he manufatures his own Ammunition
  4. Ura-Ki

    Ura-Ki Grudge Monkey

    He taught Chuck Norris every thing he knows!
  5. UncleMorgan

    UncleMorgan I eat vegetables. My friends are not vegetables.

    His bookcase is the Library of Congress.
  6. Ura-Ki

    Ura-Ki Grudge Monkey

    HE is his own Nation!
  7. tacmotusn

    tacmotusn Mosquito Sailor Site Supporter+

    His stash of precious metals is Ft. Knox.

    His food storage pantry is so big and efficient in the area of first in and first out, that he is a supplier for Winn Dixie of food stuffs long before their expired / use be date.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 27, 2018
  8. Seacowboys

    Seacowboys Senior Member Founding Member

    He understands women
    Gator 45/70, Zimmy, Bandit99 and 10 others like this.
  9. duane

    duane Monkey+++

    The army adopted his Scout rifle as the new infantry rifle.
    Gator 45/70, Zimmy, Bandit99 and 4 others like this.
  10. snake6264

    snake6264 Combat flip flop douchebag

    Has his own Nuclear Deterrent
  11. Seawolf1090

    Seawolf1090 Retired Curmudgeonly IT Monkey Founding Member

    His BOL is Cheyenne Mountain.
  12. Oddcaliber

    Oddcaliber Monkey++

    His reloading room is the Winchester ammo plant.
    Gator 45/70, Bandit99 and HK_User like this.
  13. HK_User

    HK_User A Productive Monkey is a Happy Monkey

    He can kick start a bored and stroked Knuckle Head in his flip flops even with the timing fully advanced, on the first try.
    Alf60, oldawg, Dont and 7 others like this.
  14. chelloveck

    chelloveck Diabolus Causidicus

    He was raptured before the Rapture raptured him. :rolleyes:
    Altoidfishfins, Oddcaliber and Ura-Ki like this.
  15. DarkLight

    DarkLight Live Long and Prosper - On Hiatus Site Supporter

    Water reverse osmosis filters itself in his presence.

    His garden weeds itself.

    Animals slaughter themselves in preparation for canning and long term storage.

    The atmosphere reconfigures itself for his HAM radio communications.

    His smoke detector batteries change themselves.

    After living through it and not noticing any change to his way of life, he was surprised to read about "The Great Depression" in a book.

    He is, the most prepared man in the world.
    Last edited: Jan 27, 2018
    Zimmy, Bandit99, Oddcaliber and 2 others like this.
  16. Ura-Ki

    Ura-Ki Grudge Monkey

    He recites poetry to Orcas, in their own language!!!
  17. Oddcaliber

    Oddcaliber Monkey++

    He has stockpiled so much lead and ammo he lives next to Three Mile Island.
    Bandit99 and Ura-Ki like this.
  18. Yard Dart

    Yard Dart Vigilant Monkey Moderator

    Aliens tell tales of him visiting....and call him their God.
    Zimmy, sec_monkey, Bandit99 and 3 others like this.
  19. hot diggity

    hot diggity Monkey+++ Site Supporter+++

    He creates his own wildcat rifle calibers for each type of game animal...and builds his own custom rifles.
    .30 Gireffe magnum.
  20. DarkLight

    DarkLight Live Long and Prosper - On Hiatus Site Supporter

    His HAM call sign is "1".
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