The Ramblings of an Old Warrior

The Ramblings of an Old Warrior

In the past week, there has been a little tension in the Inferno related to what was appropriate and not appropriate to post. I think we’ve reached a consensus and are all ready to move on and tackle whatever hurdle comes next because, trust me, we will encounter other bumps in the road. Handling these dilemmas will challenge our maturity but they will also offer each of us an opportunity to learn a little more about debating a point without demeaning those with opposing viewpoints.

For the most part, I have remained publicly silent throughout the fray although I certainly have distinct feelings on the subject.

But this isn't about feelings regarding the appropriateness of certain posts.

Now I’m going to drop the bombshell on you all. I’m what, for many of you, is your worst nightmare - a feminist. I was a feminist before it had a name and a feminist after it became a label. I represent every girl who was told she “couldn’t” take shop in high school because of her gender, who was “discouraged” from studying engineering in college because of her gender, who was told my her math professor that she should be home taking care of babies, who needed her husband’s signature to get a business loan for her own business, who’s opinions were dismissed because she was female, who had customers ask to speak to one of the salesmen because it never crossed their minds that a woman knew more about a typically male business than any of the men in the company.

So, the cat's out of the bag. I'm a feminist. What does that mean? Well, for me, it means being seen as a human being first and foremost. I love being a woman, have never wanted to be a man, I don't want to compete with you strictly because of gender but in spite of it and in competitive arenas only. I want my opinions to be evaluated on the basis of their intellect and not dismissed because my body grew breasts at puberty. If you open the door for me, I'll say thank you and expect the same from you when I open the door for you. I don't expect you to defer to me because I am female because I won't defer to you strictly because you are male. I will gladly accept your help when my old body isn't strong enough to do something myself but I'll put my full effort into taking care of myself before asking for help. I'm not offended by images of naked women, just a little jealous of their youth and beauty because they are always young and beautiful. Heck, at times, I like to see images of good looking guys (that is God's plan after all). The difference is, I like the guys a little older than I did when I was in my 20's. I like to see a little character in their faces, a little living on their bodies, and a little humor in their eyes. I like to see hands that have know hard work and have a little dirt under the nails to prove it. I can only hope that men value the same in me. You'll have to forgive me if I get a little testy when I am reminded that most often it isn't so.

I believe that when families decide to have a child, they should do their best to see that either the mother or father will be there to raise that child and avoid routine daycare whenever possible. I think that caring for our children is more important than that second car or the new dining room set. In my opinion, a big house and lots of 'toys' don't equal quality of life when raising a child.

I'm a feminist, a conservative, a woman of a certain age with gray hair and eyes that don't see as well as they used to and I can still laugh at myself for all that I am and all that I'm not.

But don't let any of that fool you. I am an old warrior who will continue to fight, until my life is over, so that my daughter, my granddaughters, and your daughters, and wives, and sisters, and female friends have the opportunity to prove themselves in this world.

When you attribute our responses strictly to our hormones, you are saying that you value what we look like, particularly when we are naked, but not what we think or what we feel. I admit that our hormones do strange things to us, the same as your hormones do to you. It'd all part of this glorious adventure known as life.

And when the women in your life come home and tell you they have decided to be an engineer, or a soldier or a sailor, or a ship's captain, or a police officer, or a fireman, a hairdresser, a fashion designer, a business woman, or a homemaker and a mother, look around for old warriors like me and thank them for never giving up.

RightHand

 

I am all for it, a woman being what she want’s to be. And exact equal or more doesn’t threaten me.
My wife came home one day and said “ I want to become a Dentist”
Our daughter was 5 at the time, I said “Ok” without a second thought.
Here we are 6 years later, she almost done with school!!!!
These 6 years of lean money times were and are the best time of my life with my two ladies of the house.
Thanks for being here Right Hand I do appreciate the way you are.

 

Hooray for Quigley one of the "real" men in this world.

 

RH - I KNEW I should have stopped on the way down here.

Quig - Now, your BO gear must include small tools. What an opportunity for barter.

All - Sorry 'bout the hijack. Back to ing.

 

ghrit, you're welcome anytime.

 

I think feminism is great. I treat all women the same.

Now get me a beer from the fridge! [whistle2]

 

right away master

 

Thanks RH.

I guess this means you'll be moving on then?
j/k

My wife was a successful business woman before we met. She was a Successful Realtor until we decided to start for the new addition to the family. I like a strong and determined female around because it allows us to split the household workload a little better.

I also understand the female concerns over the posting of pictures on the site. I hope it has been dealt with.

Thank You.

melbo

 

Not on your life

and Yes, I agree that we have all reached a consensus on photos. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm on my way out the door to see a Chip 'n Dale Show.

 

Yup - that's what gives us a bad name and I don't blame you for cringing. I would too. Maybe feminist isn't the right word for it anymore but I'm a creature of habit and really don't know how else to describe it.

I think most of the guys here appreciate strong women (it goes along with the survival mindset), that's one of the reasons I like it here

 

I enjoyed you story CRC. Thanks for sharing.

As far as we know, TLynn, Tracy, you and I are the only females at SM right now. Hopefully, more will decide to join our community of strong men and women. It gets better all the time!

 

Thank you, RightHand, for having the courage to be who you are, the strength to recognize it and the tenacity to become what you wanted to be! I am proud to be associated with such a fantastic group of strong women here.

Like MM, I cringe at the term "feminist". For me; it has connotations of not-so-strong women, who believe that the world should somehow change, or make allowances, for them. Call me old-fashioned, but I like fireMEN, policeMEN, etc. Don't get me wrong though; there are women that can do a man's job - it's just that they are not as prevalent as the women who think that they can do a man's job. IMO; It is those who can't that give warriors like you a bad name.

I make no concessions for gender; tell me that you can do a job and I expect that you can. I respect those who can do what they say. Expect special treatment or "soft" work for a hard day's pay and you'll be sorely disappointed when working for me, be you male or female. I will work side-by-side with a man and will admit to my limitations when applicable. There's no such thing as a job too hard and I don't recall ever getting too dirty, as every thing's washable. No matter what job I'm called to do; I'll do it as best I can and always, always remain a lady.

I retired from the construction world to be a full-time Mom; the hardest job I've ever taken on, yet worth every second of my life. I don't get a weekly envelope, but receive my pay every day. I no longer have a great medical plan; but the perks I receive now far outweigh any benefit package that I've ever had!

Thank you, again, RH. For if it weren't for ladies like you, who weren't afraid to be warriors, I wouldn't have been able to achieve success in my previous field, let alone been afforded the chance to prove myself therein. I appreciate and admire your strength, your courage, your tenacity and hope that in my journey, I have made you and your fellow warriors proud.

 

The recent thread about gender when SHTF reminded me of this oldie but goodie

ETA - link to the thread that caused this on to be bumped.
http://www.survivalmonkey.com/forum/general-discussion/28149-shtf-gender-roles.html

Thanks, RH, this is a GOOD bump.
ghrit