Top Surprises Features of the New iphone..

Discussion in 'Humor - Jokes - Games and Diversions' started by CRC, Jul 6, 2007.

  1. CRC

    CRC Survivor of Tidal Waves | RIP 7-24-2015 Moderator Emeritus Founding Member


    Comes with a default "One of us! One of us! One of us!" ringtone.

    The middle row of the new keypad arrangement spells out "B I L G A T E S U X."

    Won't work if it detects you wearing eyeglasses and a suit.

    Dial #666 to change all the digital "paintings" in Bill Gates' mansion to anime porn.

    The right key sequence turns it into a Jedi lightsabre. (now I have to get one.....[LMAO])

    Purchasing the iJack add-on feature means you need not actually be in the same vicinity as your significant other ever again.

    Just drop it in a glass of Jolt Cola to recharge it.

    Includes video of a steel-cage match between the nerdy-cool "I'm a Mac" guy and the nerdy-cool "Can you hear me now" Verizon guy.

    Comes with its own "Official Apple Beta-Tester Club" card and badge.

    The new touchscreen, combined with AT&T's wireless service, allows you to reach out and fondle someone.

    Rounded edges and mirror smooth surface makes it easier to shove up the ass of a smug owner.

    iVelcro features allows easy attaching to your Segway or Vespa.

    It conveniently combines all your indispensible functions -- phone, camera, music player and PDA -- into a single overpriced, easily lost device.

    It's name is an anagram of "hip one" -- how friggin' cool is THAT?!?

    and the Number 1 Surprise Features of the iPhone...

    Cranial-GPS feature comes in handy when you realize you've lost your freakin' mind and paid over $600 for a freakin' PHONE !!!!
  2. weapons_762

    weapons_762 Monkey+++

  3. Blackjack

    Blackjack Monkey+++

    I still don't have a regular cellphone..... guess it'll be a while before I "tech up" in the telephone department.
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