Top Ten Slogans For The Wal-Mart Wine 10. "When Kmart Wine Just Won't Do" 9. "I Can't Believe It's Not Wine" 8. "Show Your Friends How Little You Care" 7. "Kills Germs on Contact" 6. "Recommended by 4 Out of 5 Drifters!" 5. "Crack Open a Can Today!" 4. "Fresh From the Vineyards of Aisle 6" 3. "Here's to Making Bail!" 2. "Feeling Down After Being Thrown Out by Britney?" 1. "Goes Great With a 20-Dollar Hooker"
'Recommended by 4 out of 5 drifters.' The fifth couldn't endorse anything, he was too busy swilling canned wine.