To get a little quiet reading time, a woman takes her boat out onto a lake,and drops anchor. She takes out her book and starts reading. Along comes the game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside her and says,"Good morning Ma'am. What are you doing?" "Reading my book," she replies, thinking "isn't that obvious?" "You're in a restricted fishing area," he informs her. "But officer, I'm not fishing. Can't you see that?" "Yes, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to take you in and write you up." "If you do that, I'll have to charge you with rape," says the woman. "But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden. "That's true, but you do have all the equipment." MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also think.
I never argue with my wife. I learned long ago she should have been an attorney and she doesn't forget a thing. So, since she can think and remember everything I have done wrong since we met, I choose to end each arguement as quickly as possible. I made two statements during heated arguments that have taught me just to head to the basement with a couple of beers to cool off. And the statements you can learn never to say to your wife are as follows: Statement 1: "Stop acting so ******* hormonal about everything. Your driving me crazy!" --said 8 months into our first pregnancy after about 6 1/2 months of her acting totally hormonal. Now I get to hear during just about any arguement, "Sorry if I am acting too ****** hormonal. I wouldn't want to drive you crazy as I express my feelings." Melbo, do not repeat the above. Learn from my mistake as Mrs. Melbo could chew on that one for the rest of your life, too. Statement 2: "You are making me so mad, I could throw you out that window!" Ditto on standard wife arguements, depending on temperment. I get to hear things like, "Here, let me open the window so I can jump out so I don't make you too mad." Conclusion: just nod, smile, admit you are a worm, go buy a gun to make yourself happy and don't sweat the small stuff.
CRC, from him I'll take it...we know each other way too well! Besides he can shoot too (unless you put him up against Tye then of course he usually comes out second best...but I think that's only because Tye's had way too many years more practice than A has). Yep I read so does swinefornicator - by the way where the heck is WHITECLOUDERS manuscript!!!! You were supposed to send it my way!!!!!!!!!!!!!! T out
