Craig's List idiots

Legion489 · Jan 16, 2017

I've done the same thing with idiots too.

UncleMorgan said: ↑

When I get a "counter-offer" from a low-baller like that, I have a truly delicious way of handling it.

Here's how it would go, for example, with a $2,500 advertised price for an ATV, and a $1,200.00 low-ball offer:

"Will you take $1,200.00?"

"No, but I'll take $3,000.00, cash."

"Wait a minute--it's only $2,500.000!"

"Well, it was. But that was before we started negotiating. Now it's $3,000.00."

"Okay, How about $1,600?"

"No. I can't take less than $3,500.00."

"&^%#@! (Loose translation) You keep raising the price on me!"

"Well, you're the one that keeps wanting to negotiate. I'm good with just $3,500.00."

"I'll give you $1,800.00."

"That's very sweet of you. I can really use the extra money. But don't you want to buy the ATV, too?"

"No, I mean all I'll pay is $1,800.00."

"Well, if you know someone with an ATV for only $1,800.00, why are you standing here negotiating with me? You need to go buy that one before someone else beats you to it."

"No, I mean I'll only pay $1,800.00 for your ATV."

"Goodness. Whatever gave you that idea? It was listed for $2,500.00, and then you ran the price up to $3,500.00. I thought you wanted to pay more."

"No, I don't want to pay more. I only want to pay $1,800.00."

"Oh. I understand. You don't have enough money."

"Look. I have plenty of money. But I won't pay more than $1,800.00 for the #$%^# ATV!"

"Don't be embarrassed. There are a lot of people that can't afford a $4,000.00 ATV."

"$4,000.00? ARE YOU NUTS?"

"No, I'm not nuts. I'm negotiating. Do you have the $4,500.00 or not?"

"%^&**! OK. OK. I'll give you the #$%^@@ $2,500.00!"

"I'm sorry, but the absolute least I'll take is $2,600.00. That's my last and final offer, and includes all costs of negotiation, up to now. Oh, wait. I have a call... Oh, never mind. I think I have someone on the phone that will pay the whole $2,500.00."

"So you'll sell it them for just $2,500.00? Why not to me?"

"They didn't start negotiating."

At this point the low-baler either pays $2,600.00 of leaves in a huff.

(Huff on, brother! It be good for the lungs!)

Then they either come back later--and pay the $2,600.00--or they send a friend over with $2,500.00 and instructions not to start negotiating.

Actually, after all that I would probably sell the ATV for $100.00 less than the asking price just because negotiating is so much fun. But I never tell them that. It's bad for negotiations.

Beside, I can really use the money.

***

Always remember that when the price is $2,500.00 and someone offers you $1,200.00 what they are really saying is this:

"$2,500.00? Great! I'll pay it. But you have to let me sneak in later tonight while you're sleeping and steal
$1,300.00 out of you wallet/pocketbook."

Sort of casts a different light on their offer, wot?
Click to expand...

Sgt Nambu · Jan 16, 2017

You silly negotiators! I handle such situations with a hearty, "Hey, lowball, get the F off my phone and don't call again!"
Life's too short and, through sheer good fortune, I've never HAD to sell anything in my life! Obviously, YMMV.

Homer Simpson · Jan 16, 2017

I sell a bunch of stuff on CL. I only deal on the phone, no text, no e-mail, if you can't pick up the phone and call me you don't need what I am selling. I love the ones that want to negotiate over the phone, sometimes I do raise the price, sometimes, I just keep loosing the connection.

melbo · Jan 16, 2017

Seems like no matter what I put on CL I get trade offers... Will you take a dumpster as partial trade? Hey - I've got an old skateboard that I can trade straight up.

I don't have much luck on CL or ebay anymore

chelloveck · Jan 17, 2017

melbo said: ↑

Seems like no matter what I put on CL I get trade offers...
Click to expand...

To which the rejoinder would be....

"do you have a wife or girlfriend"?
LB: ....."yes"
Seller: "Would you trade her for this highly desirable sale item?"
LB:.......If answer is "No"
Then,
Seller "Then you'll be paying in cash then".....

LB........If answer is "Yes"
Then,
Seller..."No one ever trades a good un' (wife or girlfriend), so I'll be holding onto what I'm selling until someone can pay cash for the full amount."

Log in or Sign up

Craig's List idiots

Legion489 Rev. 2:19 Banned

Sgt Nambu RIP 4/19/2018

Homer Simpson Monkey+++

melbo Hunter Gatherer Administrator Founding Member

chelloveck Diabolus Causidicus

Log in or Sign up

Craig's List idiots

Legion489 Rev. 2:19 Banned

Sgt Nambu RIP 4/19/2018

Homer Simpson Monkey+++

melbo Hunter Gatherer Administrator Founding Member

chelloveck Diabolus Causidicus

Useful Searches