how to make "Old Skool" elderberry wine...

Discussion in 'Recipes' started by Witch Doctor 01, Jan 17, 2014.


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  1. Witch Doctor 01

    Witch Doctor 01 Mojo Maker

    The Making of Elderflower Hocke –
    The Viking Methode.
    First, assault Lindesfarne, pillage it and, just before burning, take 4-5 prays of the finest elderflowers (or 10 grams of the dried ones) from the best tree in the monastery.

    Second, at the height of the honey season fight your way to the Massif Central (burning Paris to distract your pursuers) and return with a kilogram of the finest clover honey.

    Thirdly, sa ck Cordoba and bring back three of their finest lemons and 200 grams of dried sultanas.

    Fourthly, visit an alchemist in Jerusalem (your local brew shop will do), extract a pinch of grape tannin from him, put him to the swo rd and burn Jerusalem to the ground so that none may divine the secret of this mighty brew.

    Fifthly, pillage Milan and take the finest goblets available (it avails you nought to drink without good company)

    Sixthly, sack Rome, have the nobles driven before you and select the finest five to be cupbearers. Of these 'blood-eagle' three in training to be an example to the remaining two. Neuter the remaining two so they will not be a temptation to the women folk.

    Seventhly, return home and have your serfs do the following:

    a) trim the flowers, discarding the stems
    b) boil the honey, 4 litres of water and macerated sultanas together for twenty minutes
    c) put the flowers, chopped lemon rind (no pith) and pinch of tannin into a 4.5 litre demijohn
    d) add the boiled liquid, top up with water
    e) let it cool
    f) add the lemon juice (nutrient and white wine yeast also)
    g) let it ferment for six days
    h) on the seventh day strain out the debris, top up with a little water
    i) let it ferment out
    j) bottle it and age it six months

    Penultimately, pass the cup of wine to your taster (one of the two nobles) in case it's poisoned (for some reason this happens a lot).

    Scold the immaculately mannered cupbearer for his lack of Viking culture.

    Finally, drink your elderflower hock in good company and discuss the deplorable state of affairs in other countries.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 17, 2014
    Ganado, Brokor, Motomom34 and 10 others like this.
  2. VHestin

    VHestin Farm Chick

    HA!
     
  3. kellory

    kellory An unemployed Jester, is nobody's fool. Banned

    ......"May the candles on your cake, burn like cities in your wake,..... ";)
     
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  4. oldawg

    oldawg Monkey+++

    Well the first part seemed easy enough and fun too. But the second part being all my serfs have escaped in my "tour"(yeah I know,should have used stronger chain)it now just seems like too much work. Don't flame. I in no way advocate having slaves.............other than the current crop of politicians of course.
     
  5. Snoozebum

    Snoozebum Monkey

    Isn't elderberry wine what the Brewster sisters poisoned everyone with in Arsenic and Old Lace?

    I knew they were tough old birds, but I didn't know how much trouble this stuff was to make!
     
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  6. Brokor

    Brokor Live Free or Cry Moderator Site Supporter+++ Founding Member

    *sigh*

    • Elderflowers
    • golden raisins
    • honey
    • lemons
    • tannic acid
    • brewing nutrient and wine yeast

    Cool story. Needed a little updating for modern times.
     
  7. Motomom34

    Motomom34 Monkey+++

    @Witch Doctor 01 that brings back memories. My Mom had a 5 gallon crock she used to make chokecherry wine in.
     
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  8. Ganado

    Ganado Monkey+++

  9. Witch Doctor 01

    Witch Doctor 01 Mojo Maker

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