Loneliness & mental survival

I drive almost 300 miles at times to the BOL just to be alone.

I do have a neighbor, lives there full time with his wife about 2 1/2 miles away, who texts every few days or so to make sure I'm still alive and I do appreciate that. He's had the unpleasant experiences of running across the carcasses of two other property owners after not hearing from them for a week or more, so understand his concern as it would seem well founded.

I'd contact him every few days, but get so busy clearing, shredding brush and tree branches or maintaining / modifying infrastructure that I forget to tell him that I'm still breathing.

Other than that, it's not uncommon to go for a week to two weeks without seeing another human, and that's by choice. The only thing that has placed a time limit on it is the need to run into town for groceries, parts, and to top up on propane, gasoline or diesel while there.

Could live without the groceries but then I'd be eating my preps. With the onset of this nasty stuff out of China, we may all be needing those sooner than we think.

Anyway, guess the point is, it's all a matter of what you can get yourself used to. Back in the late 80s my wife left me and was alone in a house of five acres outside of town. Other than a job, which later I was laid off from, had little social interaction for the next seven years. Essentially - forced myself to get used to it and kind of grew to like the solitude even though it really isn't natural. We're social animals after all.

 

Marvin, I'm certainly not going to regale you with al kinds of happy helper hints, because I don't have any. I will tell you this, the example you set by staying and working on finishing the rest of your life, is important to others beyond words. Bless you.

There are great responses and ideas and sharing of struggles in this forum, great food for thought at the least.

 

Music .. listening to it .. moving to it .. hearing lyrics that hit home .. playing my drums with or without anyone around .. great therapy indeed.

I enjoy solitary walks in the forest and along the oceans edge, kayaking, mtn biking, all with an intensity that is appropriate to my aging carcass!

nice

 

I couldn't have said it better Bandit, thank you for sharing .. becoming a ham in a temptation. I'm on high ground near the ocean, I could blast signal down along the coastline where all the people live especially If I had a directional antenna! In my commercial RF once upon a time, have built so many comms. towers and antenna systems and worked in so many transmitter buildings and set up so many base stations and repeater stations that I could never possibly begin to remember them all. Hamming seems like a shoe in ...

Excellent, the small things really are the big things.

word

Regarding social interaction, I pick and choose very carefully as there is a great deal of carpetbagging going on these days of both the social and physical sort. Maybe it's always been this way amongst monkeys who knows, either way, "social butterfly", is just not my bag and I have finally embraced that aspect of my persona as a good thing instead of feeling left out!
Enjoy your time in the presence of yourself and do the best you can when around any carpetbaggers!

 

My son is 40 and unmarried. Because of his sever drinking he cannot maintain relationships with anyone except his mother and I, and that is a strain. His loneliness is devastating. At my BOL I am never lonely even when alone for days. However, I can always end it with a phone call or by going home. He does not have that option. I hurt so much for him but his addiction will not allow him to change.

 

Change comes from within ,, not my words , but true neverless ,, we all have our demons , and deal with them in our own ways ,, some are just better dealers than others . I wish you all the strength to deal with your demons in a productive manner . And I as well .

 

OR find a SPCA type of place and see if you can join in "dog walks " (lost pups need a human friend and walker) ..You can see if you can connect , as I did with a CAT ( for me thats different) and a few pups to dogs..
I was going to try a brothel and see if , well they don't like leashes .

Jokin and Laugh Sir.. Long walks make you see funny stuff to Hmmmmm !
Sloth

 

And to try to say anything to him about the damage that can plainly be seen as a result of the drinking, makes you the enemy and not to be trusted. It's maddening because you're damned if do and you're damned if you don't. I'm very sorry. Praying helps, I don't know why or how but it does. Don't give up on him.

 

learning a musical instrument is both challenging and rewarding and if there is no one to criticize your work it's fun.

 

The very first time I got on this forum, not long ago, the first conversation/posting I read was from you, something about a fire in your shipping container, (yous guys had another name for the container but I ferget now), and I saw a photo of your charred Rhino and it was not pretty. Sorry your gals not there at the moment and yep other than plowing and shoveling, the snow is not as entertaining as it was once upon a time. Ever made a real igloo?

 

Cats can be cool, ever notice though if your petting one and your not giving the couch rat the total attention that it is entitled to, it will use your distraction to it's advantage and become all tooth and claw?

Rent a dog, great idea!

Many moons ago apre divorce I got a drum set and a bass guitar. I'm good on the drums but I can only play one string on the guitar! Lessons are on my bucket list. No matter, music is great therapy.

 

You are a hearty, stout, determined soul. I'm sure your glad you did it, just like I'm glad that I climbed towers on remote mountain tops in winter, at times during snow, at times with the temps well below zero F, at times when the wind was so strong that my hemp climbing ropes were blowing nearly horizontal. Note: One day, fleeing the incessant abuse of the former Mrs, I dug a snow cave, laid down a tarp to stay dry and fell asleep inside with someone who loved me truly, my dog! WTB: Hemp or goldline rope :: SuperTopo Rock Climbing Discussion Topic

 

Well I climbed and built and installed and removed antenna systems from comms towers not because I was particularly fond of heights or spending my days standing on cross members wearing a heavy leather climbing belt, (we didn't wear no stinkin climbing harnesses), with my lanyard wrapped around the tower structure. I did it because it needed doin and because it was a challenge. The boss, who was a desk jockey, was the greedy sort and never offered one single penny for clearly hazardous duty and I was too dumb and dedicated to ask. My primary function was doing the comms stuff too. Those lights, big ole low wattage incandescents, slightly smaller than a basketball, blew up from lightning as often as they burned out!
About the lifetimes ago, I hear that.